Hollywood Movie Review Series:

*Movies are in no particular order. Please use Crtl F on your keyboard to find a particular movie. Movies that got a wide release in the year after their first screening are listed in the next year. For example, 300 (2006) is listed in 2007 because it only got a wide release in 2007.

*Don't worry about spoilers. You can read the review of any movie without being afraid of spoilers and enjoy the movie if you watch it. I intentionally made sure not to ruin a movie by revealing a hidden plot or hidden climax scene. I simply pass or fail each scene and comment on them.

Constantine, 2005: PASS

Commercial Failure

Writer: Kevin Brodbin, Frank Cappello

Director: Francis Lawrence

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: Demons want to take over the world.

Story: Ethics

Characters: Pass

Excellent characters.

Excellent supporting characters.

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by Keeanu Reeves.

Comments:

Excellent intro.

Excellent beginning exorcist scene.

Excellent street-demon scene.

Good club talk scenes throughout.

Excellent flashback scenes throughout.

The eyes of a cat. But the cat is so cute and loving.

Excellent hell scenes throughout.

Excellent building scene.

Good prep scenes.

Excellent climax scene. Very well done.

Decent ending.

Not one of the best movies of all time, but I strongly recommend watching it.

Be Cool, 2005: FAIL

Commercial Failure

Writer: Peter Steinfeld

Director: F. Gary Gray

Dialogue: Fail

Weak dialogue.

Plot: Someone wants to kill a guy.

Story: Ambition, Relationships

Characters: Fail

All characters a complete failure.

Acting: Fail

Fail of Vince Vaughn’s acting.

Fail of Dwayne Johnson’s acting.

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Toupee coming off from the ricochet. Jokes.

Enough of the movie references please.

Fail of club sidewalk scene.

Fail of club scene.

A movie about Hollywood stars with A-listers. Sigh. Just die already.

Fail of balcony scene.

Fail of house scene.

Good past scene cinematography.

Fail of office scene.

Spinning rims. Jokes.

Fail of SUV Black crew scene.

Good breaking dancing scene.

Fail of house scene.

Fail of diner scene.

Fail of all scenes. How did this movie get a wide release? Star power.

Fail of office intimidation scene.

A complete train wreck of a movie.

Fail of club dance scene.

Fail of basketball scene.

Fail of all Dwayne Johnson scenes throughout.

Fail of Black crew sidewalk scene.

Fail of intimidation scenes throughout.

Fail of concert scene.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, 2005: PASS

Commercial Success

Writer: Steve Kloves

Director: Mike Newell

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: An evil wizard wants to capture a boy.

Story: Ambition, Relationships,

Characters: Pass

Excellent dark arts teacher character.

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Good intro.

Black dignitaries already. Oh Hollywood, you shouldn't have.

And the stupid sports thing again. Yawn.

Decent chaos scene.

Excellent ship rising scene.

Fail of team feast entrance scene.

And lightning for no reason. Oh dear.

So many shots of visible minorities in the feast. I'm blushing.

Good dark arts class scene.

Good twins scene.

Decent selection scene.

Good arguing scenes.

Fail of journalist scene.

Good fireplace scene.

Excellent riverbank scene.

Good outdoor scenes.

No magic healing for an amputee. Really?

Good dragon scene.

Good eating scene.

Excellent dance instruction scene. Well done.

Good study scene.

Good dance scenes overall.

Good bathroom scene.

Good water scenes.

Good past memory scene.

Decent Snape scene.

Good pre-climax ritual scene.

Good wand special effects.

Good return scene.

Fail of climax scene. Too unbelievable.

Good ending.

Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith, 2005: PASS

Commercial Success

Writer: George Lucas

Director: George Lucas

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: A politician wants to rule the universe.

Story: Ambition, Ethics, Relationships

Characters: Pass

Excellent characters.

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Excellent space intro. Very well done.

Good General Grievous scene.

Excellent R2 parking scene.

Good council scene.

Spy while knowing he's friends are with him. Really?

Good opera scene.

Good other planet battle scene.

Excellent Obi-Wan Kenobi fight scene. Very well done.

Excellent Windu fight scene.

Excellent special effects as usual.

Fail of Anakin pledge scene.

Fail killing scenes. Too unbelievable.

Senators intentionally approving the end of democracy. Really?

Excellent climax fight scene. Very well done.

Good ending.

Excellent writing overall, a few snags, but still solid.

Batman Begins, 2005: PASS

Potential Profit

Writer: Christopher Nolan, David S. Goyer

Director: Christopher Nolan

Dialogue: Pass

"Theatricality and deception are powerful agent. You must become more than just a man in the mind of your opponent." Excellent line, decent delivery.

"Where were the other drugs going?" I never knew, I don't know, I swear to god." "Swear to me." Good line, excellent delivery.

Plot: A group of people wants to destroy a city.

Story: Character, Ethics

Characters: Pass

Excellent characters.

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by Christian Bale.

Good acting by Liam Neeson.

Excellent acting by Michael Caine.

Comments:

Excellent jail fight intro.

Good jail talk scene.

Decent mountain scenes.

Good mountain house scene.

Excellent training scenes and past memory scenes. Very well done.

Good final mountain fight scene.

Excellent initial bat cave scene.

Excellent corporation scenes.

Excellent creation of batman scenes.

Good cop infiltration scene.

Excellent shipyard scenes.

Excellent "where are you" scene.

Good restaurant scene.

Excellent rooftop interrogations scene.

Good narrows night scene.

Excellent child/roof scene.

Excellent music content throughout. This is the composer you want for your blockbuster movie.

Good basement fight scenes.

Good car chase scene.

Excellent climax scene. Very well done.

Good ending.

Excellent writing, directing, acting, music, cinematography, dialogue.

One of the best moves of all time.

The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion Witch and the Wardrobe, 2005: PASS

Commercial Success

Writers: Ann Peacock, Andrew Adamson, Christopher Markus, Stephen McFeely

Director: Andrew Adamson

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: An evil queen wants to rule a kingdom.

Story: Character, Family, Ambition

Characters: Pass

Fail of White Queen character.

Acting: Pass

Fail of Liam Neeson’s voice acting. Not the right actor.

Comments:

Decent intro. Story doesn't make sense without it.

Beautiful old house.

Ah...White people and fantasy lands. Lovely.

James McAvoy. Wow.

Turkish delight? I'll have to take your word for it. Maybe it's like Black people and deep fried chicken. Relax, some stereotypes are true without being offensive.

Good house scenes all around.

Decent to good fantasy scenes all around.

Good beaver scenes.

Fail of fox and wolves scene.

Decent CGI animals. They did a good job of making it as realistic as possible.

Ritual sacrifice in a Disney movie. Yup, sounds about right.

Decent pre-climax battle scene.

Fail of battle climax scene. But then again, it's wrong to expect Jackie Chan-like choreography for every fight scene.

Decent ending.

Passed with 4 writers. Impressive.

A good Illuminati movie.

The Pacifier, 2005: FAIL

Commercial Success

Writer: Thomas Lennon, Robert Ben Garant

Director: Adam Shankman

Dialogue: Fail

Fail of Vin Diesel’s dialogue.

Plot: Terrorists want data on a US govt classified program.

Story: Family

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Fail of water mission scene.

Fail of most scenes. Fail of writing.

Fail of almost all family scenes.

Corn oil on stairs. What if the nanny was holding the baby?

Fail of vice principal scenes throughout.

Fail of all school scenes.

Fail of girl scout scene.

Fail of house party scene.

Fail of ninjas scene.

Fail of theater scene.

Fail of wrestling scene.

Decent scout scene.

The betrayal is nonsense.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

Are We There Yet? 2005: PASS

Potential Profit

Writer: Steven Gary Banks, Claudia Grazioso, J. David Stem, David N. Weiss

Director: Brian Levant

Dialogue: Pass

"The friend zone is for losers only. Please unload your friend and get on with your life." Excellent line, good delivery

Plot: A guy wants to be with a woman with kids.

Story: Character, Family

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Decent intro.

Fail of shop scene.

Fail of car street problem scene.

Good kids doorstep scene.

What kind of idiot would stay in the friend zone?

Decent time-lapse scenes.

Fail of grocery store scene.

Fail of basketball scene.

Decent car parking lot scene.

Good train scene.

Good car scenes throughout.

Good phone scenes throughout.

Terrible rap.

Clay Aiken. Jokes.

Fail of car accident scene.

Good party scene.

Fail of deer fight scene.

Decent climax scene throughout.

Good flashback scenes.

Fail of ending.

Barely passed with 4 writers.

Bad News Bears, 2005: PASS

Commercial Failure

Writer: Glenn Ficarra, John Requa

Director: Richard Linklater

Dialogue: Fail

Complete fail of all dialogue.

"You know, I never thought I'd hear myself say look at the ass on that second baseman. But look at the ass on that second baseman." Excellent line, fail of delivery.

Plot: A former baseball player wants a better life.

Story: Character, Relationships

Characters: Pass

Good characters.

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Good rat house intro.

Good baseball scene.

Good stands fight scene.

Decent training scenes throughout.

Good restaurant scene.

Messed up parents pushing their kids to play. That's just sad.

Hanging on to his leg. Jokes.

Good bullpen scenes throughout.

Good father/daughter scenes throughout.

Good climax scene.

Good ending.

Solid movie. Should have at least made it to Potential Profit.

Zathura: A Space Adventure, 2005: FAIL

Commercial Failure

Writer: David Koepp, John Kamps

Director: Jon Favreau

Dialogue: Fail

Fail of all dialogue.

Plot: Kids want to find a way home.

Story: Family, Survival, Character

Characters: Fail

Fail of all characters.

Acting: Pass

Fail of Dax Shepard’s acting.

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Fail of father/son talk scenes throughout.

And the neo-Jumanji magic begins.

Fail of all scenes after.

They're in space. Of course that makes sense.

Good wake up scene.

Hey, the Twilight girl (Kristen Stewart). Nice to see you.

And the giant robot. Of course.

Were the studio executives, producers and writer on crack cocaine when making this movie? Because it would explain a lot.

Complete fail of all writing.

Fail of ugly alien creature.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

Waiting, 2005: PASS

Commercial Success

Writer: Rob McKittrick

Director: Rob McKittrick

Dialogue: Pass

Excellent dialogue throughout.

"Well, it's official. My penis is just for show." Good line and delivery.

Plot: A waiter wants a better life.

Story: Character, Ambition

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Good acting by Ryan Reynolds as usual.

Comments:

Good intro.

Good to excellent restaurant staff scenes throughout.

Good weird Black guy character.

Nuts flat as paper. Jokes.

Fail of dinner night home scene.

Good b*tchy customer scenes throughout.

Fail of bathroom scene.

Ah…the hot liberal White girl with the older uglier Spanish cook. Yup, sounds about right.

Good imitation of black preacher scene.

Fail of birthday scene.

Fail of climax scene.

Good ending.

The Family Stone, 2005: PASS

Commercial Success

Writer: Thomas Bezucha

Director: Thomas Bezucha

Dialogue: Pass

Excellent dialogue from Sybil Stone character.

"She doesn't seem to know or trust herself very well." "Thank you professor." "Which means, I'm afraid, that our Everett may not know himself at all." Excellent line, decent delivery.

Plot: A man wants to marry his girlfriend.

Story: Family, Relationships

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by Diane Keaton.

Comments:

Decent intro.

Good home scenes throughout.

Excellent parent scenes throughout.

Excellent kitchen scenes throughout.

Good dinner scene.

Just dump this c*nt. Even feminist liberals would concede she's a c*nt.

Good climax scene.

Decent ending.

Cheaper By the Dozen 2, 2005: PASS

Commercial Failure

Writer: Sam Harper

Director: Adam Shankman

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: A father wants to spend time with his kids.

Story: Family, Relationships

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Good intro.

Good party scene.

Good house scenes throughout.

Good cottage scenes throughout.

Excellent dueling father scenes throughout.

Good hot mom scene.

Excellent falling in lake scene.

Good competitive singing scene.

Good daughter prank contract scene.

Excellent dog lake fall scene.

Decent water boarding scene.

Decent tennis scene.

Decent cinema scene.

Good climax scene.

Good ending.

Should have made more money.

One of the best movies of all time.

Brokeback Mountain, 2005: PASS

Commercial Success

Writer: Larry McMurtry, Diana Ossana

Director: Ang Lee

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: Two men want a better life.

Story: Relationships, Character, Family

Characters: Pass

Good characters.

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Decent office scene.

Randy Quaid. Wow. What a blast from the past. Your life would be an interesting but sad movie.

The flat calm tone works in this movie.

Good outdoor/campfire scenes throughout.

Hilarious that the marketing department fooled everyone. Well done.

Good rough sex scene.

Wow, I just realized that was Michelle Williams from Dawson's Creek. F*ck me.

Grandpa turns on the TV. Jokes.

Good tone of movie. Excellent writing and directing.

Excellent lunch house scene.

Good kitchen fight scene.

Wow. The girl from House of Cards (Kate Mara).

This movie has a lot of stars in it.

Excellent old men camp scene.

Good climax scene.

Good ending.

One of the best movies of all time.

A History of Violence, 2005: FAIL

Commercial Failure

Writer: Josh Olson

Director: David Cronenberg

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: A former mobster wants to escape his past.

Story: Character, Family

Characters: Fail

Fail of all characters.

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Good regular family scenes throughout.

Ah…the slutty cheerleader. I hope my future wife will role-play that for me one day.

The wife (Maria Bello) is stunning. Difficult to focus on anything else.

Fail of all diner scenes throughout.

He's in denial. Really? Garbage writing.

Fail of all school scenes throughout.

Going to shoot him in broad daylight. Really?

Fail of hospital scene.

BDSM sex? I don't think the MeToo movement would look too kindly on such things.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

Bewitched, 2005: FAIL

Commercial Failure

Writer: Nora Ephron, Delia Ephron, Adam McKay

Director: Nora Ephron

Dialogue: Fail

"They're arguing about paint." "Yes, I can see that." "I want to argue about paint." Decent line, fail in delivery.

Plot: A witch wants a regular life.

Story: Character, Relationships

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Good store scene.

Fail of agent talk scene.

Fail of audition scenes.

Good dad scenes throughout.

Fail of Bewitched production scenes throughout.

One ear pull and magic. Oh dear.

Another stupid funny movie. Christ.

Powerfully stupid plot. Fail of writing.

Good grocery scene.

Fail of witch lunch scene.

Fail of all scenes.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

No amount of star power can save this movie.

3 writers. Too many cooks in the kitchen.

Guess Who, 2005: PASS

Potential Profit

Writer: David Ronn, Jay Scherick, Peter Tolan

Director: Kevin Rodney Sullivan

Dialogue: Pass

"You knew you were going to kick me out a week ago?" "Son, I knew I was going to kick you out 24 years ago. Excellent line and delivery.

"I don't want to hear talking about sleeping with my daughter. You're sleeping with me now." Excellent line, good delivery.

Plot: A couple wants to celebrate their anniversary.

Story: Relationships

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Fail of Ashton Kutcher’s acting.

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Fail of elevator scene.

Fail of decorating scene.

Good room wife scene.

Fail of cab scene.

Good kitchen scene.

Checking her daughter's boyfriend into a hotel. Really?

The penis can sing. Oh dear. That's a woman in love.

Good dinner scene.

Good bedroom scene.

Good kitchen morning after.

Fail of office scene.

Fail of car scene.

Fail of dinner scene.

Good house escape.

Fail of argument scene.

Good women talk scene.

Good men talk scene.

Good climax scene.

Good ending.

Passed with 3 writers. Well done.

A Lot Like Love, 2005: PASS

Commercial Failure

Writer: Colin Patrick Lynch

Director: Nigel Cole

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: A woman wants to be with a guy.

Story: Relationships

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Fail of airplane scene.

Excellent brother scenes throughout. Very well done.

Good date scenes throughout. Weird, but it works.

Fail of restaurant date scene.

Ashton Kutcher's acting really makes the character work.

Fail of desert scene.

Hey, the guy who played Taj from Van Wilder (Kal Penn). Jokes.

Decent climax scene.

Good ending.

Fever Pitch, 2005: PASS

Commercial Failure

Writer: Lowell Ganz, Babaloo Mandel

Director: Peter Farrelly, Bobby Farrelly

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: A man and woman want to be together.

Story: Relationships

Characters: Pass

Characters were only lukewarm.

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Good intro.

Good office scene.

Good rock climbing scenes.

Good apartment scene.

Good friend scenes throughout.

Good date scenes throughout.

Everyone needs a hobby. Some people are just more into their hobby than others.

Good boxing fitness scene.

Ah…the baseball fans. These are the people who really don't give a sh*t about anything.

Good kids advice scene.

Good shower scene.

Excellent climax scene.

Good ending.

Kicking and Screaming, 2005: FAIL

Commercial Failure

Writer: Leo Benvenuti, Steve Rudnick

Director: Jesse Dylan

Dialogue: Fail

Fail of all dialogue.

Plot: A father wants his son and grandson to be more competitive.

Story: Character, Family

Characters: Fail

Fail of all characters.

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Fail of soccer scenes.

Fail of backyard fight.

Good dart talk scene.

Parents coaching. Crazy people.

The Downsides of America's Hyper-Competitive Youth-Soccer Industry

Nothing is scarier than hyper-competitive parents

Parents ruining kids sports high pressure

Fail of soccer training scene.

Fail of bed scene.

Yes, they're soccer stars, but the world goes on. And no one really cares about soccer until the World Cup. Like all sports I despise watching, soccer is included.

Fail of almost all scenes. Fail of writing.

Fail of all father/son scenes.

Excellent slow motion shot of soccer team coming out of meat truck. Best scene of the movie.

Kicking and Screaming 2005 Butcher Scene

Fail of backyard party scene.

Alex Borstein. Always a pleasure.

Sports fathers so obsessed with winning because they have no meaning to their lives? Yup, sounds about right.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

The Dukes of Hazzard, 2005: PASS

Commercial Failure

Writer: John O'Brien

Director: Jay Chandrasekhar

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: A businessman wants to run a family out of town.

Story: Ambition, Ethics

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Fail of car chase scene.

Fail of bar scene.

Fail of narration throughout.

Ah…the issues of low income White people. Would you trade it to be a mid-high income Black person? I didn't think so. No one else in the world has it worse than Black people, followed closely by Aboriginals in Canada.

Fail of all scenes. Fail of writing.

Another stupid funny movie. Just die Hollywood.

Fail of all cop scenes throughout.

Fail of climax scene.

Good ending.

The Man, 2005: FAIL

Commercial Failure

Writer: Jim Piddock, Margaret Oberman, Stephen Carpenter

Director: Les Mayfield

Dialogue: Fail

"I'm going to check the front of my car. If it smells like ass I'm going to beat you like a runaway slave." Excellent line, fail in delivery.

Plot: Criminals want to sell stolen weapons.

Story: Ambition

Characters: Fail

Agent Derrick Vann character doesn't make sense.

Andy Fiddler character is weak.

Supporting characters are weak.

Joey Trent/Kane character doesn't make sense.

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by Eugene Levy as usual.

Comments:

Fail of dental intro.

Fail of music content. Too melodramatic.

Fail of interrogation scene.

Fail of alleyway car scene. But good dialogue.

Takes out the drugs for a deal when he's being investigated. Really?

Complete fail of writing.

It's almost as if Hollywood intentionally writes sh*tty characters for visible minority leads.

Fail of car booty talk scene.

Fail of restaurant scene.

Fail of all car scenes.

Fail of homeless scene.

Good cop street scene. The second best comedy moment in the movie.

Fail of police interrogation scene throughout.

Fail of jail scene. wasted comedy potential.

Fail of bad guy bathroom scene.

A car mushing his ass against the fence. Jokes. Very well done. The first best comedy scene in the movie.

Fail of pre-climax scene.

Fail of van police scene.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of elevator scene. Wasted comedy potential.

Fail of ending.

3 writers. Too many cooks in the kitchen.

Monster-In-Law, 2005: PASS

Commercial Success

Writer: Anya Kochoff

Director: Robert Luketic

Dialogue: Pass

"I'm not leaving you, you old slut." Decent line, excellent delivery.

"You don't go and slap somebody and then apologize. Get some backbone." Excellent line and delivery.

Plot: A company wants to replace their star model.

Story: Relationships

Characters: Fail

Excellent characters.

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting throughout.

Excellent acting by Jane Fonda.

Excellent acting Wanda Sykes.

Comments:

Decent intro.

Good coffee scene.

Hey the guy from Alias (Michael Vartan). Nice to see you.

Good party scene.

The dog walker. Really?

Good meeting room scene.

Influencing an entire generation of kids who won't know how to...vote for a president. Jokes.

Excellent meltdown scene. Very well done.

Good car scene.

Excellent bathroom scene.

Good ex-girlfriend scene.

Old fashioned dial phone. Jokes.

Good mother/daughter in-law scene.

A man wants his mother to plan his wedding. Really?

Good kitchen scene.

Good lunch scene.

Good dinner scene.

Excellent climax scene. Very well done.

Excellent slapping scene.

Good ending.

One of the best movies of all time.

Just Like Heaven, 2005: PASS

Commercial Failure

Writer: Peter Tolan, Leslie Dixon

Director: Mark Waters

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: A spirit wants to stay in an apartment.

Story: Character, Relationships

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by Reese Witherspoon.

Comments:

Fail of garden scene intro.

Food hospital scenes.

Drinking so much coffee. Unfortunately, a judge in California just declared coffee to be cancerous.

Judge affirms decision to put cancer warnings on coffee in California

Ah...the state of California. So much money with Hollywood and Silicon Valley and so much crushing, sexism, racism and poverty and liberals that just can't seem to solve anything. And liberals wonder why people/businesses are moving to Texas. Elon Musk, James Van Der Beek, Joe Rogan, even Gordon Ramsay.

Frustrated Californians move out, say coronavirus 'pandemic was last straw' moving to texas

Why Texans Don't Want Any More Californians

Texas rep taunts LA Times after column claiming there's no mass exodus from California

The much-discussed 'California exodus' isn't real, study finds

Elon Musk's Tesla HQ move to Texas reportedly shocked staff

Joe Rogan sells longtime LA home for $3.45M following move to Texas

James Van Der Beek explains 'drastic changes' that led to Texas relocation

Gordon Ramsay moves restaurant HQ to Texas from California as his huge brand expansion plans start to take shape

Good bathroom scene.

Ah…women applying makeup. Fabulous patriarchal conditioning that women will forever defend as empowerment. And feminists wonder why no one takes them seriously.

Crash scene could have been better but I’ll let it go.

Rent scam. Jokes.

Good apartment scenes throughout.

Good bathroom scene.

Decent phone scene.

Decent book scene.

Pushes herself out the window. Jokes.

Good attempts to get rid of ghost throughout.

Excellent bookstore guy attempt. Well done.

Good bar scene.

Good bench scene.

Excellent hot upstairs neighbor scene. Well done.

Good outdoor porch scene.

A lonely home wrecking slut. Jokes.

Excellent restaurant scene.

Good hospital scenes throughout.

Good hot neighbor house scenes.

Good cemetery scenes.

Good sister scene.

Good bookstore guy scene.

Good bed scene.

Excellent van scene.

Excellent solution. Jokes.

Excellent climax scene.

Excellent ending.

I don't believe he asked her permission to kiss her. That would be sexual assault according to the MeToo movement because they want permission from the man for every possible intimate act. And no, body language won't cut it for these crazy feminists. They demand verbal consent or it's public and social castration for you.

One of the best movies of all time.

Yours, Mine & Ours, 2005: FAIL

Commercial Failure

Writer: Bob Hilgenberg, Rob Muir, Ron Burch, David Kidd

Director: Raja Gosnell

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: Kids from two families want to split up their parents.

Story: Family, Character

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Single mom with 10 kids. Single dad with 8 kids. Really?

Nice to see you Rene Russo.

Fail of all navy scenes throughout. Too stupid.

Fail of dating scenes throughout.

Fail of explanation kids scene. doesn't work.

Still waiting for the comedy.

Fail of bed scene.

A circular wooden base so you can spin the dish to the other side. I never thought of that. Well done.

30 minutes in and I'm still waiting for the comedy.

Fail of almost all scenes. Fail of writing.

Fail of almost all school scenes throughout.

Fail of store scene.

Hire contractors to do the work or get your kids do it for free. With today’s building codes, I can’t let the kids do it.

Fail of kids’ collective thinking.

Fail of prank scenes throughout.

Ah…White people today and no spanking. Oh dear.

Fail of Navy dinner scene.

Fail of climax scene.

Good ending.

Elizabethtown, 2005: PASS

Commercial Failure

Writer: Cameron Crowe

Director: Cameron Crowe

Dialogue: Pass

"You're a friend of Chuck's right?" "Yes." "No you're not. I'm Chuck." "Of Chuck and Cindy?" "Is that Chuck?" "It's chuck." Good line, excellent delivery.

Plot: A young businessman wants to commit suicide.

Story: Character, Relationships

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by Orlando Bloom.

Excellent acting by Alec Baldwin as usual.

Comments:

Good intro.

Well done with I'm fine lines.

Good flashback scenes.

Excellent office scenes.

Excellent bike knife scene.

Good plane scene. But the lack of passengers is quite odd.

Good music content.

Good driving scenes throughout.

Good house scenes throughout.

Excellent phone conversations throughout.

Excellent chuck alcohol scene.

Good date scenes throughout.

Partial cremation. Jokes.

Good VHS movie. Weird.

Good mother speech scene.

Good climax scene.

Good ending.

Should have made more money. The fact that it didn't proves that God does NOT exist.

Solid movie.

The 40 Year Old Virgin, 2005: PASS

Commercial Success

Writer: Judd Apatow, Steve Carell

Director: Judd Apatow

Dialogue: Pass

Excellent dialogue throughout.

Excellent erection hotline dialogue.

"What are you 25?" "I'm 40." "Holy sh*t man, you got to get on that." Excellent line and delivery.

"Please don't reminisce about the times we f*cked. It's so creepy." Excellent line and delivery.

Plot: A man wants a better life.

Story: Relationships

Characters: Pass

Excellent characters.

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by Gerry Bednob.

Comments:

Good getting to work intro.

Excellent store scenes throughout.

Excellent old Indian guy character. Very well done.

Good poker scene.

Good past memory scenes.

Excellent sex public scenes.

Good bar scenes.

Excellent glass breaking scene.

Putting the pussy up on a pedestal. Jokes.

Decent wax scene.

Excellent phone conversation with woman.

Excellent speed dating scene. Very well done.

Excellent phone India customer service scene.

Excellent child blowup scene.

Good group talk scene.

Good club/after-party scene.

Good climax scene.

Excellent ending.

Excellent writing, acting, dialogue. Very well done.

When the moon is in the 7th house. Jokes.

Excellent music ending.

One of the best movies of all time.

Sin City, 2005: PASS

Commercial Success

Writer: Frank Miller, Robert Rodriguez

Director: Frank Miller, Robert Rodriguez, Quentin Tarantino

Dialogue: Pass

Excellent dialogue.

"Ask yourself if that corpse of a slut is worth dying for." "Worth dying for. Worth killing for. Worth going to hell for." Excellent line and delivery.

"Hi, I'm Shelly’s new boyfriend and I'm out of my mind." Good line, excellent delivery.

"It's time to prove to your friends that you're worth a damn. Sometimes that means dying. Sometimes it means killing a whole lot of people." Good line, excellent delivery.

Plot: Multiple plots.

Story: Character, Ethics, Relationships

Characters: Pass

Excellent characters all around. Very well done.

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting all around. Wow.

Comments:

Excellent rooftop intro.

Excellent multiple character narration throughout.

Excellent neo-noir shots.

Excellent hospital scene.

Good bar scene.

Good car chase scene.

Good motel scene.

Excellent barn scenes. Very well done.

Excellent end to bar scene.

Excellent hotel sex scene. Fabulous cinematography.

Excellent police fight scene.

Crushing his face into brick. Too cruel.

Excellent Marv interrogation scenes.

Excellent confession scene.

Excellent basement cell scene.

Excellent church rain scene.

Good rope interrogation scene.

Excellent car scene.

Good forest fight scene.

Good church scene.

Excellent writing, directing, cinematography, music, characters, and acting.

Good apartment scene.

Excellent bathroom scene.

Excellent street cop fight/execution scene.

Excellent kill scenes.

Excellent car talk scene.

Taking a cigarette from a dead guy. Jokes.

Good outdoor fight scene.

Good sewer scene.

Good climax scene.

Excellent ending.

One of the best movies of all time.

King Kong (Extended), 2005: FAIL

Potential Profit

Writer: Fran Walsh, Philippa Boyens, Peter Jackson

Director: Peter Jackson

Dialogue: Fail

Fail of all dialogue.

Plot: A studio wants to stop a filmmaker from making a movie.

Story: Ethics, Relationships, Ambition

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Fail of Jack Black’s acting.

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Ah…the problems of the beautiful White girl. Sigh.

Dialogue brings down the movie.

Fail of board meeting scene.

Good loading scene.

Fail of ship scenes throughout.

Ah…the troubled writer. He plays it well.

Fail of solution.

Ah…the primitive Brown cultures. Of course.

Good cultural ritual sacrifice scene.

And now we have dinosaurs. Suspension of disbelief is broken.

Fail of all scenes after.

At least the giant ape is intelligent. That counts for something.

Fail of capture scenes. Too unbelievable in the 1930s.

Fail of climax scene. Too unbelievable.

Excellent use of facial reactions shots instead of dialogue in the end.

Good ending, but not enough to pass.

3 writers. Too many cooks in the kitchen.

Memoirs of a Geisha, 2005: PASS

Commercial Failure

Writer: Robin Swicord

Director: Rob Marshall

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: A girl wants a better life.

Story: Ambition, Relationships

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Good acting by Zhang Ziyi.

Excellent acting by Michelle Yeoh.

Comments:

Decent intro.

Good prep training scenes throughout.

Excellent cultural storytelling. Very well done.

Good discipline scenes throughout.

Perfect bow for a pig farmer. Jokes.

Excellent performance scenes throughout.

Women conditioning women to serve men. Yup, sounds about right. This is a good example of generational patriarchal conditioning.

Good climax scene.

Excellent ending.

Lord of War, 2005: PASS

Commercial Failure

Writer: Andrew Niccol

Director: Andrew Niccol

Dialogue: Pass

"Bullets change governments far surer than votes." Excellent line, fail in delivery.

Plot: A war-profiteer wants everyone to buy his guns.

Story: Ambition

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by Nicholas Cage.

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Good credit scene.

Fail of restaurant shooting scene.

Too much narration.

Fail of brother scene.

Yes, bullets change governments far better than votes. Kudos.

Fail of conference scene.

Good selling scenes throughout.

Excellent slow motion machine gun scene.

Always nice to see the military-intelligence-industrial complex in action.

Good ship painting scene.

Fail of deal after scene.

Fail of woman scenes throughout.

The waitress looks like she enjoys being dominated. Oh, but feminists support female domination by men sexually so it's okay. Everyone's happy.

Good helicopter bust scene.

A gold Kalashnikov. Why do the African warlords like idiots?

Good scummy wife cheater scenes throughout.

Free samples. Jokes.

Excellent plane strip down scene.

Good investigation house scene.

Good realization scene.

Good climax scene.

Fail of ending.

Kingdom of Heaven (Director's Cut), 2005: PASS

Commercial Failure

Writer: William Monahan

Director: Ridley Scott

Dialogue: Pass

"Speak the truth always, even if it leads to your death." Good line, fail in delivery.

"Your quality will be known among your enemies before you ever meet them." Good line and delivery.

"Remember, howsoever you are played, or by whom, your soul is in your keeping alone.” Good line, fail in delivery.

Plot: Muslims want to retake Jerusalem from Christians.

Story: Ambition, Ethics, Relationships, Character

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Good intro.

Excellent metal working scenes throughout.

Good training scenes throughout.

Good forest fight scene.

Hey, the guy who played Dr. Basher from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine and the prince in Game of Thrones (Alexander Siddig). Nice to see you again. A solid C-lister. But your acting skills are good enough for B and even A-lister status. I'd love to see you as the main character in a blockbuster feature.

Good desert fight scene.

Good priest knight character.

Some scenes are a bit flat and boring.

That battle scene looks very expensive.

Good Muslim leadership scenes throughout.

Good church red tape/disagreement scenes throughout.

Good climax scene. Looks expensive.

Good ending.

Tough movie to make. So much content to explain.

Mr. & Mrs. Smith, 2005: PASS

Commercial Success

Writer: Simon Kinberg

Director: Doug Liman

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: Assassins want to kill each other.

Story: Ambition, Character

Characters: Pass

Excellent characters.

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Excellent intro.

Excellent flashback scenes.

Excellent assassin scenes throughout.

Excellent house scenes throughout.

Good house baby scene.

Good op scenes throughout.

Excellent dance scene.

Excellent house gun battle.

I don't recall him asking permission to have sex with her. That's a big no no with the MeToo movement.

Excellent highway scene.

Good climax scene.

Excellent ending.

One of the best movies of all time.

Fantastic Four, 2005: PASS

Potential Profit

Writer: Michael France, Mark Frost

Director: Tim Story

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: A mad scientist wants to become a god.

Story: Relationships, Ambition

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Jessica Alba. Kudos to you for walking away from all of it.

Jessica Alba Reveals Why She SteppedAway From Acting Despite Being 'At TheTop Of My Career'

Good presentation scene.

Did he say thanks sweetie? That's definite sexual harassment and should be shamed publicly for his actions and left to rot in disgrace…so says the MeToo movement.

Dumb plot but the characters work.

Good ship accident scene.

Decent board scene.

Plot is moving too fast.

He kissed the nurse without her permission. This man is complete scum in the eyes of the MeToo movement who want verbal permission for any and all intimate activities.

Good transformation scenes throughout.

Good Ben wife scene.

That rock body suit looks hot.

Good highway scene.

Set fire to Earth's atmosphere. What?

Fail of parking garage scene.

Fail of outdoor fight scene.

What country gives someone a steel mask? What is this, The Man in the Iron Mask?

Fail of climax scene.

Good ending.

Decent characters and writing.

Hitch, 2005: PASS

Commercial Success

Writer: Kevin Bisch

Director: Andy Tennant

Dialogue: Pass

Excellent dialogue.

"A woman's best friend has to sign off on all big relationships decisions." Decent line, fail in delivery.

Plot: Men want to be in loving relationships.

Story: Character, Relationships

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Excellent intro.

Ah…another print journalism job. Print media is not long for this world.

Excellent dating prep scenes throughout.

Fail of board meeting scene.

Good restaurant scene.

Good dating scenes throughout.

Excellent apartment dance scene.

Good climax scene.

Good ending.

The Transporter 2, 2005: FAIL

Potential Profit

Writer: Luc Besson, Robert Mark Kamen

Director: Louis Leterrier

Dialogue: Fail

Fail of all dialogue. Complete garbage.

Plot: Someone wants to kidnap a rich family's child.

Story: Ambition, Family, Ethics

Characters: Fail

Fail of all characters.

Fail of Frenchman character.

Terrible police characters.

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Fail of parking garage intro.

It's better that the driver is taking him and not the mother? That's a screw-up by the writer.

Fail of hospital plot.

Well done for strong female characters though.

Who is this movie made for? I thought Luc Besson had some class? But I guess not with these garbage films.

Clearly a wooden door will stop the bullets.

Excellent cinematography throughout, but junk action.

Instead of that lovely car stunt, he could have jumped, but that wouldn't make sense of course.

Fail of Frenchman police station scene. Powerfully unbelievable.

Good scuba action scene.

Seniors on a school bus. Tough. My heart breaks for them.

The police machine breaks down. What?

Excellent shed fight scene.

Slapped in the face by a piece of wood. Well done.

Fail of scientist and hero scene.

Excellent house fight scene.

Fail of real plot. While it could happen, real scientists/doctors would check.

While the fight scenes are excellent it's not enough to pass this garbage movie.

Fail of fight between hero and woman.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of plane fight.

Fail of ending.

Sideways, 2005: FAIL

Commercial Success

Writer: Alexander Payne, Jim Taylor

Director: Alexander Payne

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: A writer and actor want a better life.

Story: Ambition, Relationships

Characters: Fail

Fail of all characters.

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by Paul Giamatti.

Comments:

Fail of intro, flat and boring. Everything goes downhill from there.

This movie was only made with star power.

Plot is too boring and sad.

Fail of all bar, diner, and dinner scenes.

So many depressed people probably resonate with this movie.

Good golf blowup scene.

Fail of beat up scene.

Wasted comedy potential in almost every scene.

Fail of climax scene.

Good phone message ending.

Aeon Flux, 2005: FAIL

Epic Commercial Failure

Writer: Phil Hay, Matt Manfredi

Director: Karyn Kusama

Dialogue: Fail

Fail of dialogue. Complete garbage.

Plot: Rebels want to overthrow a govt.

Story: Ambition, Ethics

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Too much narration.

Post apocalyptic society too unbelievable. Beyond suspension of disbelief.

Fail of weird ESP scenes throughout.

Fail of music content.

Fail of all fight scenes throughout.

Fail of infiltration scene.

At least they were kind enough to throw in a strong Black woman. Two actually. I'm impressed.

Fail of running infiltration scene.

Fail of group talk scene.

Fail of all govt scenes throughout.

Fail of confinement scene.

Good marble scene.

Fail of sex scene.

Fail of weird satin/silk ship scene.

Fail of real plot scene.

Fail of realization scene.

Recycling humans after death. You might laugh now, but if liberal atheists have their way, it will be coming to a future near you.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

One of the worst movies of all time. This movie shouldn’t have made $1.00. The fact that it made over $50 million proves that God does NOT exist.

XXX: State of the Union, 2005: FAIL

Epic Commercial Failure

Writer: Simon Kinberg

Director: Lee Tamahori

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: Terrorists want to kill intelligence agents.

Story: Ambition, Ethics

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Fail of all white house scenes throughout.

Fail of prison interview scene.

Fail of prison break scene.

Umm…they could have shot his leg, but no. Really?

Fail of music content throughout.

Fail of all fighting scenes throughout.

Fail of diner scene.

Fail of old school hideout scene.

Fail of uptown scene.

Fail of NSA infiltration scene.

Terrible writing.

Fail of street highway scene.

Fail of intel profile scene.

Fail of Dafoe house scene.

Fail of tech hideout scene.

Fail of lunch scene.

Fail of ballroom scene.

Fail of setup scene.

Fail of swat house scene.

Fail of strategy scene.

Fail of rescue scene.

Decent car garage scene.

Is this the Black way to save the president? Weak.

Trucks with guns with a cheese cover. Well done.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

The Island, 2005: PASS

Commercial Failure

Writer: Alex Kurtzman, Roberto Orci, Caspian Tredwell-Owen

Director: Michael Bay

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: A corporation wants to harvest clones.

Story: Ambition, Survival

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Excellent intro.

Excellent facility scenes throughout.

Good interview scenes throughout.

Humans as products to be owned by corporations. Yup, sounds about right.

Excellent process scene.

Excellent escape scene.

Excellent realization scene.

Excellent presentation scene.

Good escape scene throughout.

Decent explanation scene.

Excellent cinematography.

Excellent street escape scene.

Excellent climax scene.

Good ending.

A good Illuminati movie.

Excellent writing, directing, acting.

Passed with 3 writers. Kudos.

Assault on Precinct 13, 2005: PASS

Commercial Failure

Writer: James DeMonaco

Director: Jean-Francois Richet

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: A group wants to kill a kingpin in jail.

Story: Character

Characters: Pass

Fail of all characters.

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by Laurence Fishburne.

Comments:

Good intro.

Head shot. Oh dear.

Decent cop precinct scene.

Good church scene.

Fail of transport scene.

Fail of transport scene. Too unbelievable.

Good psychologist scene.

Fail of music content.

Good attack scenes throughout.

No longer civilians or cops. Put them all down. Really? Too unbelievable.

And no backup at all. No one can see anything. Really?

Excellent first and second standoff scenes.

Very sad car scene. Well done.

The prisoner characters and Fishburne’s acting really passed this movie even though the plot is too unbelievable.

Good third standoff scene.

Good climax scene.

Decent ending.

Should have made a bit more money, at least to Potential Profit.

The Legend of Zorro, 2005: FAIL

Commercial Failure

Writer: Roberto Orci, Alex Kurtzman

Director: Martin Campbell

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: A secret society wants to destroy the US govt.

Story: Character, Ambition, Family, Relationships

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Fail of Julio Oscar Mechoso's acting.

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Fail of fight scene.

Good home scenes throughout.

Fail of store gun scene.

Good hotel scene.

Fail of all school scenes throughout.

Fail of ball scene.

Fail of horse scene.

Fail of bad guy asswipe scenes throughout.

Not even close to the 1998 Zorro movie.

Good farm fight scene.

Decent child cliff scene.

Fail of jail explanation scene.

Good bomb demo scene.

Fail of church scene.

Decent climax scene, but not enough to pass.

Decent ending.

Elektra (Director's Cut), 2005: FAIL

Commercial Failure

Writer: Raven Metzner, Zak Penn, Stuart Zicherman

Director: Rob Bowman

Dialogue: Fail

Fail of all dialogue. Complete garbage.

Plot: An evil ninja group wants to kill a child.

Story: Character

Characters: Fail

Terrible characters.

Acting: Pass

Fail of Kirsten Prout’s acting.

Fail of Will Yun Lee’s acting.

Comments:

Fail of animation intro.

Fail of live action intro. But excellent fireplace cinematography.

Unfortunately, the empowered woman superhero didn't work because the backstory/character is garbage. To be fair, Wonder Woman is just as much garbage as Elektra. The only 3 strong women characters are" Beatrix (Kill Bill), Ripley (Alien), and Sarah Connor (Terminator).

Thanks for not showing so much skin though. That's a plus.

Fail of all evil bad guy scenes. Just terrible.

Fail of stupid handler scenes.

Fail of past scenes. Nice cinematography though and throughout.

It's nice that her lifestyle is so methodical, but no one cares.

Fail of house girl/Elektra scenes throughout.

Ah yes, the man with the horns. Yawn.

Fail of training scenes.

Fail of music content throughout.

Fail of all girl/Elektra scenes.

Fail of all writing. Garbage writing.

Fail of house attack scene.

Fail of evil bad guy boardroom scene.

Fail of pool room scene.

Fail of practically every scene. It's a complete train wreck. Fail of writing and directing.

Coming out of the graffiti. Well done.

Fail of house scene.

Fail of forest scene.

Ninja's descending ever so slowly. Oh dear god.

Fail of training scene.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

One of the worst movies of all time. This movie shouldn’t have made $1.00. The fact that it made over $50 million proves that God does NOT exist.

3 writers. Too many cooks in the kitchen.

Miss Congeniality 2: Armed and Fabulous, 2005: FAIL

Commercial Failure

Writer: Marc Lawrence

Director: John Pasquin

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: Someone wants to kidnap a beauty pageant.

Story: Character, Relationships

Characters: Fail

Good gay hairstylist character.

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Fail of bank heist. Who robs a bank in broad daylight? Why are these movies still being made?

Excellent apartment scene. I felt very sad for her. Well done.

Good workout scene.

Good makeover guy scene, but her character doesn't make sense anymore.

Good Regis show scene.

When they elect a Black woman president? Not for another 10 years at least. Or sooner if Biden gets tossed/resigns.

Good bar scene.

FBI agent as the hottest celebrity. Beyond suspension of disbelief. Ha ha ha.

Fail of pre-plane scene.

Fail of hostage scene.

Fail of car scene.

Fail of hotel scenes throughout.

Fail of fighting scene b/w two women.

Fail of airport scene.

Fail of room scene.

Fail of infiltration scene.

Fail of FBI director scenes.

FBI agents who want money and publicity? Sigh. Sadly, the FBI is a corrupt institution that entraps and blackmails people.

FBI Honeypot Ensnares Michigan Man

FBI intentionally destroyed Aswad Khan life, terrorist watchlist, because he didn't want to be an FBI informant.

Ex-FBI lawyer Kevin Clinesmith given probation after guilty plea in John Durham probe

Watchdog report blasts FBI for 'fundamental errors' in Larry Nassar sex abuse investigation

Never trust the FBI. Period. Just get a good lawyer and make an official police report.

Fail of performance scene.

Fail of climax scene.

Excellent ending.

Jarhead, 2005: PASS

Commercial Failure

Writer: William Broyles, Jr.

Director: Sam Mendes

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: US military wants to destroy the Iraqi govt.

Story: Ethics

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by Jamie Foxx.

Comments:

Excellent intro. Very well done.

Holy f*ck, the drill prep scene is excellent.

Love taps. Jokes.

Excellent narration throughout.

Excellent music content.

Excellent hazing scenes.

Good toilet scene.

Excellent training scenes throughout.

Good regular scenes throughout.

A video of the wife screwing another man. Rough.

Burning off shit. That can't be good to breathe in.

Ah…starting to lose it. Well done.

For all US soldiers, you have no right to refuse vaccines or pills. Most are mandatory. And that’s coming from a guy who refuses to get the COVID vaccine. In my defense, if it provided lifetime immunity (like the chicken pox and MMR vaccine), I’d take it. But getting it every six months because it loses efficacy shows the incompetence of medical innovations today.

Excellent charred death scene.

Good climax scene.

Excellent ending.

Solid movie. Should have made more money.

Good writing, directing, acting.

One of the best movies of all time.

Capote, 2005: FAIL

Commercial Success

Writer: Dan Futterman

Director: Bennett Miller

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: A journalist wants to investigate a crime.

Story: Ambition

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by Philip Seymour Hoffman. Very well done.

Excellent acting by Bruce Greenwood and his buttery voice. If I was gay, that voice would be the one.

Comments:

Flat intro and flat scenes throughout the movie, but it's based on a true story so...

Flat press conference.

Everything is flat and boring. That's one reason why it didn't get past $50 million.

Close to an Epic Commercial Success because of the skinny budget. Well done with that budget.

At least they were nice enough to include a Black man on the train. Well done Hollywood. Yes, it's a period piece, but visible minorities still existed back then.

Good climax scene, but not enough to pass.

Flat end. sorry, but I couldn't appreciate it, even with the somber keys of the piano music.

Hostage, 2005: FAIL

Epic Commercial Failure

Writer: Doug Richardson

Director: Florent Emilio Siri

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: A man wants to kill his wife and child.

Story: Ambition

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Decent intro.

Fail of hostage scene.

Fail of all home scenes.

Ah…White trash idiots, always ready to do stupid things. Lovely.

Yes, the cop has his demons, but he’s the only one who can do it. Sigh.

Interesting kidnapping car scene.

Fail of music content.

The second plot could have worked with a better first plot.

Fail of almost all scenes. Fail of writing.

Fail of climax scene.

Decent ending.

The Adventures of Sharkboy and Lavagirl 3-D, 2005: FAIL

Commercial Failure

Writer: Robert Rodriguez, Marcel Rodriguez

Director: Robert Rodriguez

Dialogue: Fail

Fail of all dialogue.

"But fear exists in the one place you can never escape. Your mind." Good line and delivery.

Plot: An evil being wants to destroy the dream world.

Story: Character

Characters: Fail

Complete fail of all characters. Holy f*ck they’re terrible.

Acting: Fail

Fail of all acting.

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Everything looks like a set and CGI.

Fail of school scenes throughout.

Fail of home scenes throughout.

Fail of cinematography.

A train wreck of a movie. Fail of writing. Complete failure of everything.

Oh my god, is that Taylor Lautner? F*ck me.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

One of the worst movies of all time. This movie shouldn’t have made $1.00. The fact that it made $70 million proves that God does NOT exist.

Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo, 2005: PASS

Commercial Failure

Writer: Rob Schneider, David Garrett, Jason Ward

Director: Mike Bigelow

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: Someone wants to kill manwhores.

Story: Character, Relationships

Characters: Pass

Excellent characters.

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by Eddie Griffin.

Comments:

Good intro.

Dolphin slapping her. Jokes.

Only a Black man has hydraulics on his boat. Jokes.

Good cafe scene.

Excellent gay jokes/scenes throughout.

Old man is a ho. Jokes.

Good attack scenes throughout.

Looking down his pants. Jokes.

Chicken and waffles. Jokes.

Manwhore union. Jokes.

Nutsack insured. Jokes.

Excellent man whore union scenes throughout.

Fail of pot truck scene.

Attack a country for oil. Jokes.

Fail of throat woman scene.

Ass hair bleached. Could have been better.

Good porn production scene.

D*ck in the hand. Jokes.

Fail of office scene.

Decent climax scene.

Stuffing the pants. Jokes.

Bill in the throat. Jokes.

Good ending.

Should have made at least Potential Profit.

Passed with 3 writers. Kudos.

One of the best movies of all time.

Lords of Dogtown, 2005: FAIL

Epic Commercial Failure

Writer: Stacy Peralta

Director: Catherine Hardwicke

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: Teenagers want a better life.

Story: Relationships, Character

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Ah…the terrible life of White surfer.

Sloppy seconds. Oh dear.

Fail of surf shop scene.

Nice skateboarding tricks but a sh*t movie.

Fail of skateboard guy fight scene.

Having sex beside his sister, while she's also having sex. Eww. I get it’s the ‘70s…but still.

It had potential to pass with friends plot, but weak writing.

Fail of most scenes. Fail of writing.

Fail of climax scene.

Excellent ending.

Ice Princess, 2005: PASS

Epic Commercial Failure

Writer: Meg Cabot, Hadley Davis

Director: Tim Fywell

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: A girl wants to get a physics scholarship.

Story: Character, Family

Characters: Pass

Good b*tchy mom character.

Acting: Pass

Good acting by Kim Cattrall.

Comments:

Decent intro.

Michelle Trachtenberg from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Nice to see you.

Decent class scene.

Good house scene.

Interesting physics project. I wouldn't have thought of it.

A wrench. What is he going to do? Hit her with it?

Good skating scenes throughout.

A pad so you don't hurt yourself when you fall. I've never seen one of those before.

Decent hallway talk scene.

Good party scene.

What was the music clearance bill for this movie? Must have been pretty high.

Good training scenes throughout.

I never knew the world of figure skating was so cut throat. You learn something new every day.

Good argument mother scenes.

Good kitchen scene.

Good skating competition scenes throughout.

Good climax scene.

Good ending.

Should have made it to at least Potential Profit.

Crash, 2005: PASS

Epic Commercial Success

Writer: Paul Haggis, Bobby Moresco

Director: Paul Haggis

Dialogue: Pass

Too much excellent dialogue to point out.

Plot: Various people want a better life.

Story: Character, Family

Characters: Pass

Excellent characters all around.

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by Keith David.

Excellent acting by Sandra Bullock as usual.

Good acting by Ryan Phillippe.

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Good gun store scene.

Good house argument scene.

Good cop pullover scene.

Excellent worker/litter girl home scenes throughout.

Good cop/boss talk scene.

Fail of cop scenes.

Good cop black woman scene.

Good production set scene.

Excellent rollover rescue scene.

Excellent racial issues in this movie.

Good attempted car robbery scene.

Excellent cop argument/talk scene.

Excellent climax scene.

Excellent ending.

Excellent connection of all stories.

Excellent writing, directing, acting, cinematography, music content.

One of the best movies of all time.

Herbie: Fully Loaded, 2005: PASS

Potential Profit

Writer: Thomas Lennon, Robert Ben Garant, Alfred Gough, Miles Millar

Director: Angela Robinson

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: A girl wants to be a NASCAR driver.

Story: Ambition, Relationships

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Good car hauling scene.

Decent track scene.

Good car heap scene.

Excellent car scenes throughout.

Excellent car-keying scene.

Good scenes throughout.

Good racing scenes throughout.

Best ride of her life. What a car whore.

Decent monster truck scene.

Good climax scene.

Driving over another car in NASCAR. Jokes.

Good ending.

Passed with 4 writers. Impressive.

Fun with Dick and Jane, 2005: PASS

Commercial Failure

Writer: Judd Apatow, Nicholas Stoller

Director: Dean Parisot

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: A giant company wants to commit fraud.

Story: Ambition, Family

Characters: Pass

Excellent characters all around.

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting all around.

Comments:

Excellent intro.

The son holding the phone for her. Jokes.

Excellent cinematography throughout. Great shots.

Good elevator scene.

Holding hand from so far away. Jokes.

Good corporate outdoor scene.

"Like my daddy always used to say" and then pauses. Very well done. Excellent writing.

Unrealistic that the VP would know nothing, but I'll let it slide.

Excellent office panic scenes.

Good home scene.

Electric collar. That's just cruel.

Excellent corporate competition scene.

Good Walmart look alike scenes throughout.

Good workout scene.

2.99 for all you can eat. But it's a 2005 movie so...

Decent breakout scene.

Good sleep scene.

Good to see how bad a family could fall.

Decent break-in scenes.

Fail of bar scene.

Excellent shots of future action scenes.

Good climax scene.

Grand monkey. Jokes.

Excellent gun scene facial expression.

Excellent ending.

Lost pensions. Take a look at Sears or Detroit.

Sears pension payments cut by 30% this week

What's killing Sears? Its own retirees, the CEO says

Detroit defeats pensioners' appeal over bankruptcy cuts

Detroit bankruptcy 'threw everything into chaos' for retirees

Solid movie. Production budget was too high though. Someone didn't take a pay cut.

One of the best movies of all time.

Sahara, 2005: FAIL

Commercial Failure

Writer: James V. Hart, Thomas Dean Donnelly, Joshua Oppenheimer, John C. Richards

Director: Breck Eisner

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: Confederates want to hide treasure from the Union.

Story: Ambition, Ethics

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by Steve Zahn.

Fail of Lambert Wilson's acting. Wrong actor for role. A sad decline after The Matrix.

Comments:

Good intro with excellent special effects.

A contamination that would destroy the world's oceans. Really? Too unbelievable.

Interesting initial 21st century scene, but unbelievable. Slow motion makes it more unbelievable.

Windsor knot problem. Jokes.

Health plot could have worked if it was the main plot instead of secondary to ship plot.

Health plot played for 2 minutes in beginning. Didn't really get back to it until 35 minutes in (minus small dinner scene).

Music content a bit overdramatic. Need to take it down a few notches. This isn't a Mummy movie with Brendan Fraser.

Good sound effects. Crisp.

Good rescue scene.

3 lamas watching a train go by. Jokes. Very well done.

Fail of admiral to help plot.

Real secret plot not as expected. But not in a good way.

Excellent truck escape with excellent music content.

Movie had a few excellent comedic scenes, but not enough to pass.

I think the writer and director thought that this was a James Bond movie and no one corrected them. It even has Bond like music. Sigh.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

This movie had potential to pass.

$160 million budget. Way too high. Paramount Pictures has money to burn.

4 writers. Too many cooks in the kitchen.

Wedding Crashers, 2005: PASS

Commercial Success

Writer: Steve Faber, Bob Fisher

Director: David Dobkin

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: Two men want to crash weddings.

Story: Character, Relationships

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting all around.

Comments:

Good intro.

Excellent wedding crashing scenes throughout.

Ah…the sad lonely slutty liberal women. Easy pickings.

Excellent wedding reception scenes throughout.

Good beach scene.

Good family sport scene.

Little friend needs a time out. Jokes.

Excellent dinner scene.

Good father room talk scene.

Excellent pre-climax scene.

At a funeral. Oh dear.

Excellent climax scene.

Excellent ending.

Flightplan, 2005: PASS

Commercial Success

Writer: Peter A. Dowling, Billy Ray

Director: Robert Schwentke

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: Someone wants to kidnap a child.

Story: Family

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting all around.

Comments:

Good intro.

Good home scenes.

Good airport scene.

Good plane search scenes throughout.

A bit odd that no one saw the child. They would have seen her at check-in, but...I’ll let it go.

Interesting real plot.

Good climax scene.

Good ending.

Yes, all the passengers should feel guilty and hate themselves. Assholes.

Solid movie. The writing, acting, and directing made it work together. Separately, it wouldn’t have worked.

Four Brothers, 2005: FAIL

Commercial Failure

Writer: David Elliot, Paul Lovett

Director: John Singleton

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: Someone wants to kill an old woman.

Story: Family, Ethics

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by Mark Whalberg as usual.

Comments:

Decent intro.

Fail of all investigative scenes throughout.

Fail of black man running with woman scene.

Fail of dinner talk scene.

Fail of will estate scene.

Fail of brothers investigation scene.

Fail of basketball scene.

Fail of escape scene.

Fail of diner scene.

Fail of car chase scene.

Fail of restaurant boss scene.

Fail of parking garage scene.

Fail of bowling scene.

Vigilante justice beyond suspension of disbelief.

Of course there would be blowback. Why are the characters always so stupid?

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

Diary of a Mad Black Woman, 2005: FAIL

Epic Commercial Success

Writer: Tyler Perry

Director: Darren Grant

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: A man wants to cheat on his wife.

Story: Character, Relationships

Characters: Fail

Only Medea's character is passable.

Acting: Fail

Fail of all acting around.

Comments:

Fail of intro.

A woman who's mad because she's with a controlling husband. Yawn. And desperate to be with him. Yup, sounds about right.

Ah…broken women together. Lovely.

Excellent Medea scenes throughout, but not enough to pass.

Fail of house scenes.

Good court scene.

Fail of house party scene.

Fail of drug plot.

Ah yes, Black people's only savior, Jesus. Lovely.

Fail of almost all scenes. Fail of writing.

Jesus made me forgive him. Yawn.

Fail of all hospital scenes.

Fail of narration throughout.

Fail of house scenes after hospital.

Fail of climax scene.

Decent ending.

Domino, 2005: FAIL

Epic Commercial Failure

Writer: Richard Kelly

Director: Tony Scott

Dialogue: Fail

Fail of all dialogue.

Plot: Bounty hunters want to steal money from a casino.

Story: Ambition, Purpose

Characters: Fail

Fail of all characters except main woman.

Acting: Fail

Excellent acting by Winona Ryder.

Good acting by Delroy Lindo.

Comments:

Good intro.

Bounty hunters hunting White trash. Uh…okay.

I wonder how much it cost to clear Manchurian Candidate 1962 movie. Yah, those old TV shows/movies aren’t free to use in a movie, unless of course the distributor owns those rights as well.

Fail of DMV scene.

Good non-linear use.

Too much narration.

Fail of flashback scene.

Fail of lap dance scene.

Fail of almost every scene.

A new mod squad. Sigh.

Fail of TV pitch scene. Christ, this movie is powerfully stupid.

Fail of Jerry Springer show scene.

A society that rewards stupidity lets banks run the world? And people think we're going places? Oh we're going places, but not the ones we should be going to.

Fail of DMV scene.

Fail of heist.

Complete fail of writing, directing.

This might have worked with a better writer.

Fail of heist explanation.

Fail road scene.

Fail of music content throughout. I don't know what this movie wanted to be. I don't think the writer knew either.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

Even two A-listers couldn't save this movie.

Good Night, and Good Luck, 2005: FAIL

Epic Commercial Success

Writer: George Clooney, Grant Heslov

Director: George Clooney

Dialogue: Fail

"We're going to go with this story, because the terror is right here in this room." Excellent line, fail in delivery.

Plot: Govt wants to crack down on communists in America.

Story: Ethics

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by David Strathairn.

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Explanation scene could have been shown in scenes instead of text.

Ah…print journalism. Just die already. If it wasn’t for senior citizens, it would already be dead. Oops, they’re being killed by COVID (aka the Chinese bioweapon) in 2020/21.

Boring and flat dialogue throughout.

Fail of all scenes. Complete fail of writing and directing.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

Sorry, but I couldn't appreciate the supposed brilliance of this movie.

Kudos on the slim production budget.

Continued in Part 2.