Hollywood Movie Review Series:

*Movies are in no particular order. Please use Crtl F on your keyboard to find a particular movie. Movies that got a wide release in the year after their first screening are listed in the next year. For example, 300 (2006) is listed in 2007 because it only got a wide release in 2007.

*Don't worry about spoilers. You can read the review of any movie without being afraid of spoilers and enjoy the movie if you watch it. I intentionally made sure not to ruin a movie by revealing a hidden plot or hidden climax scene. I simply pass or fail each scene and comment on them.

Roll Bounce, 2005: FAIL

Commercial Failure

Writer: Norman Vance Jr.

Director: Malcolm D. Lee

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: No one wants to give a father a decent job.

Story: Character

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Decent intro.

Decent to fail of rollerblading scenes throughout.

How much was the music clearance bill for this movie?

Fail of fight scene.

Fail of asshole performance scene.

Corny jokes. Fail of writing.

Fail of implementation of backstory. Seems that it was trivialized. Now it’s just a sh*tty dance movie.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, 2005: PASS

Commercial Failure

Writer: Douglas Adams, Karey Kirkpatrick

Director: Garth Jennings

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: Extraterrestrials want to rule the universe.

Story: Ambition, Character, Relationships

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Good intro.

Excellent narration style.

You're death may be monitored for training purposes. Jokes.

Excellent special effects throughout.

Should have kept going with the sofa bit.

Decent ship scenes throughout.

Decent climax scene.

Good ending.

Munich, 2005: PASS

Commercial Failure

Writer: Tony Kushner, Eric Roth

Director: Steven Spielberg

Dialogue: Pass

"You kill Jews and the world feels bad for them and thinks you're animals." "Yes, but then the world will see how they've made us into animals. They'll start to ask questions about the conditions in our cages." Excellent line. Complete fail in delivery.

Plot: Terrorists want to kill Jewish athletes.

Story: Character, Ambition

Characters: Pass

Acting: Fail

Fail of Eric Bana’s acting. Not the right actor for the role.

Fail of Daniel Craig’s acting.

Excellent acting by Ciarán Hinds.

Comments:

Good intro.

Good news reporting scene.

Movie is from an interesting point of view.

Fail of home recruitment scene.

Eric Bana wasn't the actor for the lead role.

Good investigative scenes throughout.

Good power relations ploys. Who's working for who?

Movie could have been better with sound effects.

Good climax scene.

Good ending.

This could have been one of the best movies of all time. But it’s just okay.

Hustle & Flow, 2005: PASS

Epic Commercial Success

Writer: Craig Brewer

Director: Craig Brewer

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: A pimp wants to pimp out women.

Story: Family, Character

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by Terrence Howard.

Comments:

Good intro.

Excellent car scenes throughout.

Good stripper scenes.

Good house scenes throughout.

Good convenience store scene.

Using cardboard cup trays as acoustic foam. That's ghetto and brilliant.

Excellent door scene.

Excellent music creation. Very well done.

This is one of Terrence Howard's best movies.

Good fair scene.

Good crazy woman house scene.

Excellent recording fight scene.

Excellent cinematography throughout.

Excellent store scene.

Wow, this movie is hardcore like Straight Outta Compton. I love it. No p*ssyfooting here.

Excellent writing, directing, acting, cinematography.

Good bar scene.

Good climax scene.

Fail of ending.

Solid movie.

Kudos for the super slim budget. But it should have made more money. The fact that it didn't proves that God does NOT exist.

Man of the House, 2005: FAIL

Epic Commercial Failure

Writer: Robert Ramsey, Matthew Stone, John J. McLaughlin

Director: Stephen Herek

Dialogue: Pass

"Why did your marriage fall apart?" "That is one of many things that you and I will never discuss." Good line and delivery.

Plot: Dirty FBI agent wants to kill witnesses.

Story: Family, Character, Relationships

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Decent intro.

Fail of church scene.

Split shot doesn't work at all. Fail of writing and directing.

Fail of bust scene.

Cheerleaders as role models. Oh dear god.

Fail of interview scene.

Clueless idiots and a conservative cop. Oh dear. Too stupid.

Hey, a double balcony house. You don't see many of those today.

"This is my happy face." Jokes.

Fail of game scene.

Decent pizza scene.

Good bathroom scene.

Fail of FBI office scenes throughout. Too stupid.

Fail of roller balding scene.

Good church dance scene.

What was the music clearance bill for this movie? Sounds pretty high.

Fail of grocery store scene.

Fail of bar scene.

Good date scene.

Fail of van scene.

Fail of climax scene.

Decent ending.

3 writers. Too many cooks in the kitchen.

Into the Blue, 2005: FAIL

Epic Commercial Failure

Writer: Matt Johnson

Director: John Stockwell

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: Plane owners want to get their drugs from a sunken plane.

Story: Ambition

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Jessica Alba. Nice to see you in your heydays of fame. I remember you prior to Dark Angel, on Flipper back in the day.

Decent boat scene.

Fail of airport scene.

Powerfully stupid movie.

Could have just called the coast guard when they found the plane, but then there's no movie.

Ah yes, do it ourselves and hope no one notices. Sigh.

Fail of almost all scenes. Complete fail of writing.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

Prime, 2005: PASS

Potential Profit

Writer: Ben Younger

Director: Ben Younger

Dialogue: Pass

Excellent dialogue throughout.

"But why am I being involved." "How are you being involved?" "Because I'm in the car." Decent line and delivery.

Plot: A man wants to be with a woman.

Story: Relationships, Ambition

Characters: Pass

Excellent characters, except sociopath friend.

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Good dual contrast intro.

Excellent therapy scenes throughout.

Decent car ride.

Guy, who does that to woman in broad daylight? Not cool.

I just noticed that everyone's White in this movie. Well done Hollywood.

At least the intro paintings have Black people, and the bell boy was Black. That counts for something.

Decent movie scene.

Good dating scenes throughout.

Excellent family scenes.

Fail of realization scene. Wasted comedy potential.

Fail of talking with other therapist. Wasted comedy potential.

Fail music content throughout.

Good cross of therapy and non-therapy scenes. Well done.

Excellent furniture scene.

Fail of both realizing. wasted comedy potential.

Feeding a cat beer. That's not cool.

Good climax scene, but could have been better.

Good ending.

Sky High, 2005: FAIL

Commercial Failure

Writer: Paul Hernandez, Bob Schooley, Mark McCorkle

Director: Mike Mitchell

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: Alien bad guys want to destroy superheroes.

Story: Relationships

Characters: Fail

Complete of all characters.

Acting: Pass

Fail of Kurt Russell’s acting.

Comments:

Decent intro.

Fail of house scenes throughout.

Fail of superhero parents.

Fail of superhero school scene throughout.

Powerfully stupid.

Fail of all training scenes throughout.

Fail of all scenes. Complete fail of writing and directing.

Hero and sidekick dichotomy. Really?

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

One of the worst movies of all time. This movie shouldn't have made $1.00. The fact that it made over $80 million proves that God does NOT exist.

3 writers. Too many cooks in the kitchen.

Mindhunters, 2005: FAIL

Epic Commercial Failure

Writer: Wayne Kramer, Kevin Brodbin

Director: Renny Harlin

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: Someone wants to kill FBI profilers.

Story: Character, Survival

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Good investigative scene.

Cassettes. Wow.

Fail of lecture scene.

Fail of bar scene.

Fail of training scene throughout.

Fail of shower scene.

Only want me for my mind. Get the f*ck outta here.

Fail of all scenes. Fail of writing.

Fail of music content.

Fail of characters drawing on each other. Powerfully stupid.

Decent climax scene, but not enough to pass.

Fail of ending.

War of the Worlds, 2005: PASS

Commercial Success

Writer: Josh Friedman, David Koepp

Director: Steven Spielberg

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: Extraterrestrials want to destroy humanity.

Story: Family, Survival

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Decent work scene.

Umm…why does the street scene look light a street of white light?

Fail of color grading. Very rare failure.

Good house scene.

Good backyard scene.

Stop drop and roll.

Decent power outage scenes.

And the aliens come. Lovely.

From what I'm seeing, this looks like an expensive movie.

Good alien attack scenes throughout.

If anyone can outlive an alien invasion it's Tom Cruise.

Good escape/survival scenes throughout.

Ah…the rebellious son. Lovely.

Good river scene.

Excellent alien house scene.

Excellent silent communication scene.

Excellent mirror scene.

Fail of climax scene, but still passable.

Fail of ending.

Syriana, 2005: FAIL

Commercial Failure

Writer: Stephen Gaghan

Director: Stephen Gaghan

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: Two oil companies want to merge.

Story: Character, Family, Purpose

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by Mazhar Munir.

Comments:

Decent intro.

Ah…the secret sex/party life of Arab women. It's very real.

Fail of party scene.

Fail of gardening talk scene.

Fail of board meeting scene.

Fail of plane scene.

Fail of White House intel scenes throughout.

Fail of all George Clooney scenes throughout. Not the right actor for the role.

Four plots in motion. Sigh.

Fail of almost all scenes. Fail of writing.

Fail of climax scene.

Good ending.

American audiences don't like to watch movies about Muslim extremists.

Serenity, 2005: FAIL

Epic Commercial Failure

Writer: Joss Whedon

Director: Joss Whedon

Dialogue: Fail

Fail of dialogue.

Plot: Govt assassin wants to capture a psychic.

Story: Character

Characters: Fail

Fail of all characters.

Acting: Fail

Fail of all acting around.

Comments:

Fail of intro. Too unbelievable. Moving too fast. Beyond suspension of disbelief.

Excellent dream scene. Holy sh*t. Well done. But everything goes downhill from there.

Fail of escape scene.

Fail of investigative scenes throughout.

Fail of all characters and dialogue. Complete garbage.

Fail of ship scene.

Fail of music content.

Fail of all planet scenes.

Complete garbage movie.

Share of the bounty. Oh dear.

She's a skilled marital artist. Of course, that must have been part of her Matrix training. Oh dear.

Fail of assassin talk/attack scene.

Fail of all scenes. Fail of writing.

Fail of chemical idea. Too stupid.

Fail of climax scene.

Good ending.

Son of the Mask, 2005: FAIL

Epic Commercial Failure

Writer: Lance Khazei

Director: Lawrence Guterman

Dialogue: Fail

"This is a fake." "Yes, but it's a good fake." Decent line, excellent delivery.

Plot: A god wants to find a mask.

Story: Family, Ambition

Characters: Fail

Acting: Fail

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Fail of museum fight scene.

Ah…kids at the height of daddy's balls and the pain that comes. Someone needs a cup.

Fail of all home scenes.

Fail of all bad guy scenes. Complete garbage.

Hey, the guy from Van Wilder (Kal Penn). Nice to see you again.

Complete fail of all scenes. Fail of writing and directing.

Sorry, but only Jim Carrey could make it work.

Why does the new mask look like a mannequin?

Fail of all mask scenes throughout.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

One of the worst movies of all time. This movie shouldn’t have made $1.00. The fact that it made $60 million proves that God does NOT exist.

The Brothers Grimm, 2005: FAIL

Commercial Failure

Writer: Ehren Kruger

Director: Terry Gilliam

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: Someone wants to steal children.

Story: Family, Character

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by Matt Damon.

Comments:

Good intro. But everything goes downhill from there.

Fail of almost all scenes.

Just so everyone knows, the stories by the Grimm Brothers are not copyrightable. I'm talking to you Disney.

Fail of art department costumes throughout.

Is that Cersei Lannister from Game of Thrones (Lena Headey)? F*ck me. Nice to see you.

Fail of all royalty scenes throughout.

Fail of all scenes. Fail of writing and directing.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

The Constant Gardener, 2005: PASS

Potential Profit

Writer: Jeffrey Caine

Director: Fernando Meirelles

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: A husband wants to investigate his wife's death.

Story: Relationships

Characters: Pass

Excellent main characters.

Acting: Pass.

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Good office scene.

Good lecture scene.

Relationship scene a bit too fast, but…

Good non-linear plot.

Excellent recap of life scenes throughout.

Good breakdown scenes throughout.

Excellent awkward scene with music.

Good investigation scenes throughout.

Good threat scene.

Good confrontation scene.

Good climax scene.

Excellent ending.

Solid movie.

The Great Raid, 2005: PASS

Epic Commercial Failure

Writer: Carlo Bernard, Doug Miro

Director: John Dahl

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: Japanese military wants to kill American POWs.

Story: Ethics

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by Joseph Fiennes.

Comments:

Decent intro.

Good military scenes throughout.

Writer attempting to focus on too many characters.

You invade a country, what do you expect? Humane treatment? Yah right.

Good prison scenes throughout.

Good nurse scene.

Good attack scene throughout.

Good climax scene.

Decent ending.

Good real life ending.

Americans in general can't stand movies where they're being tortured by "inferior visible minorities."

Walk the Line (Extended), 2005: FAIL

Commercial Success

Writer: Gill Dennis, James Mangold

Director: James Mangold

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: A man wants to be a country singer.

Story: Ambition, Relationships, Family

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by Reese Witherspoon.

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Good harsh home life scenes throughout.

Shoe polishing. Before my time, but still done at the airports.

Fail of studio recording scene.

Good performance scene.

Ah…the women who love to screw singers. Maybe in my next lifetime.

Divorce is an abomination? Ah…the times we live in. There are so many Catholics and Christians that are divorced. And those that don't divorce live powerful unhappy lives.

Fail of breakdown scenes.

Good double performance scene.

Difficult to feel sorry for him with his character defaults.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

Based on a true story, so....

The Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants, 2005: FAIL

Commercial Failure

Writer: Delia Ephron, Elizabeth Chandler

Director: Ken Kwapis

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: 4 friends want to stay connected.

Story: Relationships, Family

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Fail of narrated intro.

Fail of childhood play. Wasted comedy potential.

Experiment from the hippie days. Jokes.

Alexis Bledel. Wow. I was wondering what happened to you after Gilmore Girls.

Good clothing shop scene.

If the moms met there, the writers should have juxtaposed the mothers friendship.

Fail of writing.

Fail of small Italian home scenes.

A view of other houses. Really?

A girl wants a piece of the fine Italian man. I don’t think that the MeToo movement would approve.

A girl who wants a piece of her coach. That’s a no no for the MeToo movement.

Fail of phone scene.

Ah…the token Asian guy. At least that counts for something.

I don't think I saw a Black character at all.

I'm sure the writer had good intentions, but all the different scenes are weak. They don't really connect with the audience. And I think that audience would agree since this movie is a Commercial Failure.

Hey, the woman from Last Man Standing (Nancy Travis).

Fail of music content throughout.

Fail of solution. Reminds me of the terrible Kendall Jenner Pepsi ad.

Pepsi Pulls Controversial Kendall Jenner Ad After Outcry

Fail of all writing and directing.

Good phone conversation.

Oh...the dog is so cute and loving.

Good wedding climax scene, but not enough to pass.

Decent ending.

The Longest Yard, 2005: PASS

Commercial Failure

Writer: Sheldon Turner

Director: Peter Segal

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: A prison warden wants to win a football game.

Story: Character

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Decent to good prison scene throughout.

Good training scenes throughout.

Fail of basketball scene.

Good video movie scene.

A shot to the referee’s balls. Jokes.

Good climax scene.

Decent ending.

Surprisingly, a decent movie.

The Ringer, 2005: FAIL

Commercial Failure

Writer: Ricky Blitt

Director: Barry W. Blaustein

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: A hospital doesn't want to operate on a non-insured foreigner.

Story: Relationships

Characters: Fail

Acting: Fail

Fail of Johnny Knoxville’s acting. Not the right actor for the lead role.

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Fail of janitor scene.

Fail of solution.

Pretending to have disabilities. That’s not cool.

Katherine Heigl. You’re in so many movies. Kudos.

Fail of all scenes. Fail of writing.

Fail of training scenes throughout.

Fail of pool scene.

Developmental disabilities as a comedy. Only South Park can pull that one off.

Is this supposed to be a comedy? Oh dear god.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

Unleashed, 2005: FAIL

Epic Commercial Failure

Writer: Luc Besson

Director: Louis Leterrier

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: A loan shark wants to condition a human to be a guard dog.

Story: Character, Relationships

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Decent intro.

A human as a mad dog in a collar. Really?

An Asian fighter serving a rich White man. Yup, sounds about right.

Fail of car scene.

Fail of sex scene.

The fight scenes are good, but the plot enabling the fight scenes is complete garbage.

Fail of writing.

Good piano scene.

Fail of underground fight scene. Even the strongest man has the weakest neck.

Good old man house scenes throughout.

Fail of old man scene finding him again.

Fail of almost all scenes.

Good flashback scenes throughout.

Fail of climax scene.

Excellent ending.

If the plot wasn't so stupid, the flashback story could have worked. Shame.

Pride and Prejudice, 2005: FAIL

Potential Profit

Writer: Deborah Moggach

Director: Joe Wright

Dialogue: Fail

Intellectual English dialogue doesn't work for me.

Plot: A woman wants to be with a man.

Story: Relationships, Family

Characters:Fail

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by Keira Knightley.

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Another period piece. Oh dear god.

"Have you no respect for my nerves?" Jokes.

Fail partying scene.

Fail of all house scenes. Boring, fake and flat scenes and dialogue.

Fail of group talk scene. Let us take a turn about the room. Oh dear god.

Decent house scene.

Women lusting after men. Conservatives would love it. Liberals will confuse it with female empowerment.

Fail of almost all scenes. Fail of writing.

Proposing so desperately. That's just sad.

Good church scene.

And another desperate proposal. This time in the rain. Oh dear god.

Lovely huge trees (if they're real).

Selling off women like they were property. White conservative men yearn for those days again.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

The Upside of Anger, 2005: PASS

Commercial Failure

Writer: Mike Binder

Director: Mike Binder

Dialogue: Pass

Excellent dialogue throughout.

"Even when no one’s talking, it's loud." Decent line, fail in delivery.

Plot: A mother wants a better life.

Story: Family, Character, Relationships

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by Joan Allen.

Good acting by Kevin Costner.

Comments:

Good intro.

Interesting how people act and make plans based on false information.

A lonely controlling woman with an asshole. Yup, sounds about right.

Ah…the high school days. Lesson to the young ones. If a potential partner doesn't like you, don't ask why.

Excellent scenes between Costner and Allen throughout. Very well done.

One of Kevin Costner's best movies.

Breaks down the door. Jokes. Wouldn't play well with the MeToo movement now.

Solid writing.

Good climax scene.

Good ending.

This movie should have made more money. The fact that it didn't proves that God does NOT exist.

Beauty Shop, 2005: FAIL

Commercial Failure

Writer: Kate Lanier, Norman Vance, Jr.

Director: Bille Woodruff

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: A manager wants to control an employee.

Story: Family, Ambition

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Good acting by Queen Latifah as usual.

Fail of Kevin Bacon’s acting. Not the right actor for the role.

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Fail of radio scenes throughout.

Keshia Knight Pulliam from The Cosby Show. Where have you been?

Kevin Bacon as a gay hairdresser owner. Wow. I didn’t see that coming. Shame his acting is sh*t.

Alicia Silverstone. How? Why?

Fail of initial hairdresser scene.

Mena Suvari. Wow.

Fail of park scene.

Fail of piano scene.

Fail of house renovating scenes.

Djimon Hounsou. Jesus Christ. How many stars are in this movie?

Fail of women leaving scene.

Lay that hair down. Jokes.

Fail of most attempted comedy scenes. Wasted potential.

Fail of chocolate boy scene.

One of those crying men. Jokes.

La Cosa Nostra. Jokes. But food scene could have been better.

White people controlling Black neighborhoods. Yup, sounds about right.

Fail of hair bag. Oh dear.

Fail of hustling scene.

Weak house scenes throughout.

Fail of fight scene.

Fail of club scene.

Fail of climax scene.

Decent ending.

Weak writing and acting. Shame.

I’d love to see Queen Latifah in better written movies.

Get Rich or Die Tryin, 2005: FAIL

Commercial Failure

Writer: Terence Winter

Director: Jim Sheridan

Dialogue: Fail

Complete fail of all dialogue.

Plot: A gang wants to run drugs on the streets.

Story: Ambition, Character, Relationships, Family

Characters: Fail

Fail of all characters.

Acting: Pass

Good acting by Terrence Howard.

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Black thugs not sure about the rules of engagement in a robbery. What?

No bulletproof glass. Really?

Gotta respect a n*gga's territory. Of course.

Fail of almost all scenes. Fail of writing.

Fail of police scenes.

Fail of all drug scenes.

Drugs to take us out of the ghetto. Oh dear. You can never take the ghetto out of thugs.

Decent club scene.

Ironing money. Jokes.

Fail of funeral scene.

Fail of lunch scene.

Fail of car scene.

Fail of club scene.

Ah…young love. Hopefully in my next incarnation.

Fail of drive by scene.

Fail of godfather speech.

Fail of jail scene.

Thugs shooting cops. Really?

Fail of torture scene.

Good prison talk scene.

Good diner scene.

Fail of surgery scene.

Fail of recording scene.

Good march scene.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

The Weather Man, 2005: FAIL

Epic Commercial Failure

Writer: Steven Conrad

Director: Gore Verbinski

Dialogue: Pass

"My hips are cold. Tartar sauce. That's when you know it's cold. I like eating pussy. Tartar sauce. A lot of guys do, well maybe they do. Maybe that's just Black guys. Tartar sauce. Decent line, excellent delivery.

Plot: A weather man wants a better life.

Story: Family, Relationships

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Fail of DMV scene.

Fail car scene.

People throw stuff at me. Jokes.

Bullsh*t name. Jokes.

240K a year without a degree. Really?

Fail of skating scene.

Ladies…if the blowjobs lack enthusiasm, that’s a serious problem in a marriage.

This is a sad movie, and not in a good way.

Fail of park talk scene.

Fail of kids talk scenes throughout.

Fail of vision scene.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

In the Mix, 2005: FAIL

Unknown (most likely Commercial Failure)

Writer: Jacqueline Zambrano

Director: Ron Underwood

Dialogue: Fail

Complete fail of all dialogue.

"If growing up in the hood is so dangerous, why is it that I only get shot by White people?" Excellent line, fail in delivery.

Plot: Mobs want to kill rival mobs.

Story: Relationships, Family

Characters: Fail

Acting: Fail

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Fail of apartment scene.

Fail of house scene.

Emmanuelle Chriqui from Entourage. Lovely.

Fail of all mafia Italian scenes throughout.

Decent to fail of Kevin Hart scenes throughout.

Fail of all scenes. Christ, watching back to back terrible movies is tough.

Fail of yoga scene.

Fail of restaurant scene.

High IQs and triplets. Jokes.

Fail of pool scene.

Fail of alley scene.

Powerfully stupid movie. Complete fail of writing.

How did this movie get a wide release?

Fail of bodyguard/woman scenes throughout.

Fail of cards scene.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

An Unfinished Life, 2005: FAIL

Epic Commercial Failure

Writer: Virginia Korus Spragg

Director: Lasse Hallstrom

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: A man wants to abuse his girlfriend.

Story: Family, Character

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Hey, the guy from Billions (Damian Lewis).

Fail of escape scene.

Fail of log cabin scenes throughout. Boring. Fail of writing.

Fail of restaurant scene.

The bear is so cute and loving.

Fail of car/rain scene.

Fail of bear truck scene.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

This movie wouldn't have been made without Jennifer Lopez.

Rebound, 2005: FAIL

Epic Commercial Failure

Writer: Jon Lucas, Scott Moore

Director: Steve Carr

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: College basketball regulators want to ban a coach.

Story: Family, Character

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by Megan Mullally.

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Fail of basketball scene.

Fail of office scene.

Good house/kids scene.

Excellent kids basketball hallway scene.

Good late night talk scene.

Breckin Meyer from Inside Schwartz. Nice to see you again. A solid C-lister.

Fail of principal scenes throughout.

Patrick Warburton from Seinfeld. A lot of C-listers in this movie.

Fail of coaching scenes throughout.

Fail of most basketball scenes.

Good slow motion scene.

Fail of almost all scenes.

Not good enough even as a family movie.

Excellent locker room face scene.

Fail of school bus scene.

Decent bar scene.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

How much did production pay for the Eye of the Tiger song in the end? What a waste.

Coach Carter, 2005: PASS

Commercial Failure

Writer: Mark Schwahn, John Gatins

Director: Thomas Carter

Dialogue: Pass

Excellent dialogue.

"Whoa...look at the bow. look at that. I tied that. I tied that sh*t." Weak line, excellent delivery.

Plot: A school wants a new high school coach for a difficult team.

Story: Character, Ambition, Relationships

Characters: Pass

Excellent characters all around.

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by Rick Gonzalez.

Excellent acting by Samuel Jackson.

Comments:

Decent intro.

Good basketball locker-room fight scene.

Excellent initial intro with coach scene.

Excellent training scenes throughout.

Excellent stick up scene.

Excellent game scene throughout.

Excellent street scenes throughout.

Excellent home scenes throughout.

Excellent principal talks scenes throughout.

Excellent locker scene.

Excellent store scene.

Good club scene.

Good party house scene.

Good bus scene.

Good car scene.

Parents and teachers who see basketball as the best that kids can do. How sad.

Excellent shooting/house scene. Very well done.

Good council scene.

Excellent gym study scene.

Excellent climax scene.

Good climax scene.

Excellent ending.

One of the best movies of all time.

Excellent writing and acting. This movie should have made more money. The fact that it didn't proves that God does NOT exist.

Rumor Has It, 2005: FAIL

Commercial Failure

Writer: Ted Griffin

Director: Rob Reiner

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: A woman wants to find her real family.

Story: Purpose, Family, Relationships

Characters: Fail

Fail of all characters.

Acting: Pass

Good acting by Kevin Costner.

Good acting by Jennifer Aniston.

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Fail of plane scene.

The acting is solid, but the characters are weak.

Fail of problem and solution.

And she falls for him and it's a trifecta ladies and gentleman.

This is the kind of woman that every man should stay away from. Crazy liberal women.

Always nice to see the problems of mid-high income White people. But in 2018 Black people are getting f*cked by White people at every level.

Starbucks C.E.O. Apologizes After Arrests of 2 Black Men

LA fitness employees called 911 on black men accused of not paying

Video of Minnesota man threatening to call police on black entrepreneurs goes viral

Golf course that called the police on black women loses business, faces call for state investigation

Central Park: Amy Cooper 'made second racist call' against birdwatcher

She claimed a 9-year-old Black boy groped her. Then she apologized, racist white woman

How 'Gardening While Black' Almost Landed This Detroit Man in Jail, racist white woman

Fail of all rekindling dating scenes.

Good climax scene, but not enough to pass.

Decent ending.

Stay, 2005: FAIL

Epic Commercial Failure

Writer: David Benioff

Director: Marc Forster

Dialogue: Pass

"The world will remember you. Now take off your clothes." Good line, fail in delivery.

Plot: A man wants to kill himself.

Story: Character

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Decent intro.

Interesting mailbox shot in the beginning. Would be nice to see in future movies.

"I'm good at what I do but clueless about suicide." Really?

Fail of scene changes. But the director is going for artistic value.

Interesting effects, but weak characters.

Fail of climax scene.

Decent ending.

Interesting plot, but fail of writing and directing. This movie should be redone.

This movie shouldn't have cost $50 million to make.

Stealth, 2005: FAIL

Epic Commercial Failure

Writer: W. D. Richter

Director: Rob Cohen

Dialogue: Fail

Complete fail of all dialogue.

Plot: US military wants to use AI fighter jets to fight wars.

Story: Ambition, Survival, Relationships

Characters: Fail

Complete fail of all characters. Oh dear god.

Fail of Capt. George Cummings character.

Acting: Pass

Fail of Richard Roxburgh’s acting.

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Fail of all scenes. Oh dear god. Fail of writing.

Complete garbage movie.

Fail of music content. I feel that the composer really tried hard to get the perfect music content. But you can’t get a perfect music score when the movie is complete garbage.

Fail of music effects (rare).

Lighting equals life and autonomy. Of course that makes sense.

Fail of cinematography throughout.

The movie gets dumber by the minute. I honestly can't believe it’s this bad.

Were the studio executives, producers and writer on crack cocaine when making this movie? Because it would explain a lot.

Fail of all plot and solution scenes throughout

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

***Do not watch this movie. Should only be watched as a reference in how NOT to make a movie.

One of the worst movies of all time. This movie shouldn't have made $1.00. The fact that this movie made over $75 million proves that God does NOT exist.

I'm sure the writer had a vision for this from the beginning, but somehow they lost their way.

$135 million production budget. Holy f*ck. Sony Pictures Releasing has money to burn.

North Country, 2005: FAIL

Epic Commercial Failure

Writer: Michael Seitzman

Director: Niki Caro

Dialogue: Fail

Fail of all dialogue.

Plot: An employer wants to discriminate against women.

Story: Relationships, Family

Characters: Fail

Acting: Fail

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Boring flat characters.

A mother rationalizing spousal abuse. What is this, a ghetto crack house?

Women accepting sexual harassment at work and "boys will be boys." Really?

A female lawyer supporting gender discrimination. Sadly, many female lawyers defend scummy men.

Larry Nassar's lawyer doubts he could have assaulted so many people

Donna Rotunno: the legal Rottweiler leading Harvey Weinstein's defense

She's Harvey Weinstein's Lawyer, and She Thinks #MeToo Is 'Dangerous' Donna Rotunno

And many women help men harass and sexually abuse other women.

Women enable men like Matt Lauer and Charlie Rose

"They're Nothing, These Girls": Unraveling the Mystery of Ghislaine Maxwell, Epstein's Enabler

Ghislaine Maxwell convicted of sex-trafficking girls for Jeffrey Epstein

Jeffrey Epstein accuser names four women in his web of enablers

What to make of Weinstein's "young female assistant" who aided his sexual assaults

NY attorney general sues Harvey Weinstein civil rights violations

Fail of big speech scene.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

The Interpreter, 2005: PASS

Commercial Failure

Writer: Charles Randolph , Scott Frank , Steven Zaillian

Director: Sydney Pollack

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: Someone wants to kill a journalist.

Story: Ethics, Ambition

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by Nicole Kidman. Some of her best acting. Very well done.

Good acting by Sean Penn.

Comments:

Good intro.

Good UN scenes throughout.

Decent eavesdropping scene.

Fail of bar scene.

Good street scene.

Good translator scene.

Fail of office scene.

Good explanation scene.

Good night scene.

Jesper Christensen from Casino Royale. Always a pleasure.

Good investigative scenes throughout.

Good bus scene.

Excellent apartment scene.

Good climax scene.

Decent ending.

Passed with 3 writers. Well done.

Must Love Dogs, 2005: PASS

Commercial Failure

Writer: Claire Cook, Gary David Goldberg

Director: Gary David Goldberg

Dialogue: Pass

"Alright they can't win, but they lose beautifully and the whole experience is just better." Decent line, fail in delivery.

Plot: Two people want to get over their divorce.

Story: Relationships

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Good acting by Diane Lane.

Fail of John Cusack’s acting. Wrong actor for the role.

Comments:

Excellent interview intro.

Christopher Plummer. Wow.

Good house family scene.

Good boat talk scene.

Went off script. Jokes.

Good grocery store scene. Wrong music content.

A lot of A, B, and C-listers here.

Good school scene.

Boob shirts. Jokes.

Excellent catfished date scene.

Checked her coat and never came back. How cruel.

Good park scene.

Good family scenes throughout.

Good restaurant scene.

Good outdoor family scene.

Fail of teenage boy scene.

Good awkward confrontation scene.

Good father/daughter talk scene.

The story went off from here. Odd.

The dog is so cute and loving.

Decent climax scene.

Good ending.

The Ice Harvest, 2005: FAIL

Epic Commercial Failure

Writer: Richard Russo, Robert Benton

Director: Harold Ramis

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: A man wants to steal money.

Story: Ambition

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Fail of car scene.

Fail of strip scene.

Fail of car talk scene.

Fail of bar strip scene.

Fail of restaurant scene.

Terrible dialogue throughout.

Fail of family scene.

Fail of beautiful woman scenes throughout.

Decent trunk scene.

Fail of everything. The solution is terrible. Too many bland characters. Fail of writing.

Fail of dock scene.

Randy Quaid. Wow. How? Why?

Decent climax scene, but not enough to pass.

Fail of ending.

Not one of the worst movies of all time, but pretty close.

Just Friends, 2005: PASS

Unknown (most likely Commercial Success)

Writer: Adam 'Tex' Davis

Director: Roger Kumble

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: A company wants to sign a music star.

Story: Relationships

Characters: Pass

Excellent characters all around.

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by Ryan Reynolds as usual.

Excellent acting by Chris Marquette. The boy has some talent.

Comments:

Good intro.

Good transformation.

Body shake. Jokes. Could have been better though.

Good hometown scenes throughout.

Good movie scene.

Good date scenes throughout. Excellent miscommunication/bad signals scenes.

Good climax scene, but doesn't make sense with ending realization. But I'll give it a pass since the comedy is good.

Good ending.

In Her Shoes, 2005: FAIL

Commercial Failure

Writer: Susannah Grant

Director: Curtis Hanson

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: Two women want a better life.

Story: Character, Family, Relationships

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by Cameron Diaz.

Comments:

Decent intro.

Fail of car scene.

Good house scene.

Fail of boardroom scene.

Fail of bar scene.

Weak scene throughout.

Fail of sex scene.

Sh*t for brains tramp. Jokes.

Boring scenes throughout.

Weak grandma/granddaughter scenes throughout.

Weak relationship scenes throughout.

End of plot should have been the real plot from the beginning.

Fail of climax scene.

Decent ending.

Movie should be redone with a better writer.

The Honeymooners, 2005: FAIL

Epic Commercial Failure

Writer: Barry W. Blaustein, Danny Jacobson, David Sheffield, Don Rhymer

Director: John Schultz

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: A man wants a better life.

Story: Ambition, Relationships

Characters: Fail

Acting: Fail

Fail of all acting.

Comments:

Fail of intro. The MeToo movement would consider that sexual assault and harassment.

Decent toast/baby scene. Wasted comedy potential.

Relationship scenes too unbelievable.

Fail of diner scene.

Fail of sports TV scene.

Fail of bar scene.

Fail of sewer scene.

Still waiting for the comedy.

Fail of all solution scenes. Too stupid.

30 minutes in and still waiting for the comedy.

Fail of most scenes. Fail of writing.

Fail of park scene.

Fail of dog trainer scenes throughout.

Fail of mother scenes throughout.

Fail of dinner scene.

Fail of break n scene.

Fail of training scenes throughout.

Fail of party scene.

Fail of racing scenes throughout.

How did this movie get a wide release?

Excellent visible minority casting but weak characters and garbage comedy. Almost as if Hollywood wants visible minority led movies to fail.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

4 writers. Too many cooks in the kitchen.

Red Eye, 2005: PASS

Commercial Success

Writer: Carl Ellsworth

Director: Wes Craven

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: A man wants to extort a hotel manager.

Story: Ambition

Characters: Pass

Excellent characters.

Acting: Pass

I don’t think that Cillian Murphy was the correct actor for this role. But he still did well.

Comments:

Excellent intro scene. No dialogue. Only actions and good music content. Well done.

Fail of homeland security/TV scene at airport.

I didn't expect that twist on the plane. Well done.

As if he could get away with that head butt. But suspension of disbelief is still working.

That's a good way to hide weapons. Well done.

Decent climax scene.

Good ending.

Saw II, 2005: PASS

Epic Commercial Success

Writer: Leigh Whannell, Darren Lynn Bousman

Director: Darren Lynn Bousman

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: Someone wants to abduct people.

Story: Survival, Family

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by Tobin Bell.

Fail of Donnie Wahlberg’s acting. Wrong actor for the role.

Comments:

Good intro.

Good investigative scenes throughout.

Good warehouse scene.

Excellent survival scenes throughout.

Good Kramer talk scenes throughout.

Decent cremation scene.

Good flashback scene.

Good climax scene.

Excellent ending.

Excellent writing and directing.

Alone in the Dark, 2005: FAIL

Epic Commercial Failure

Writer: Elan Mastai, Michael Roesch, Peter Scheerer

Director: Uwe Boll

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: A man wants to open a portal.

Story: Survival, Ambition

Characters: Fail

Acting: Fail

Comments:

Fail of text intro.

Fail of airplane scene.

Fail narration throughout.

Fail of cinematography throughout.

Complete fail of writing, directing, music content, cinematography.

Fail of street scene.

Even the best acting couldn’t have passed this movie.

Fail of ship scenes throughout.

Fail of all scenes.

Fail of museum scene.

Fail of all govt intel scenes throughout.

How did this movie get a wide release?

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

One of the worst movies of all time. This movie shouldn't have made $1.00. The fact that it made less than $13 millions proves that God DOES exist.

3 writers. Too many cooks in the kitchen.

The Devil's Rejects, 2005: FAIL

Potential Profit

Writer: Rob Zombie

Director: Rob Zombie

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: A family wants to kill people.

Story: Ambition, Ethics

Characters: Fail

Good sheriff character.

Acting: Fail

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Ah…White trash at its best.

Fail of house shootout scene.

Oh my god, the clown guy from the 2003 movie House of 1000 Corpses (Sid Haig). Wow.

It was a dream. Jokes.

Fail of all scenes. Complete fail of writing and directing.

Fail of motel scene.

How did this movie get a wide release?

Fail of investigation scenes throughout.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

House of Wax, 2005: PASS

Commercial Failure.

Writer: Charles Belden, Chad Hayes, Carey Hayes

Director: Jaume Collet-Serra

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: A man wants to kill people.

Story: Relationships, Ambition

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Good intro.

Is that Paris Hilton? Oh dear god.

Decent car scene.

Good campfire scene.

A lot of stupidity here, but…

Yes, go with the strange man with all the weapons.

Good truck escape scene.

Good wax process scenes throughout.

Good cinematography throughout.

Good church scene.

Good camp death scene.

Good theatre scene.

Good climax scene.

Decent ending.

Surprisingly, a good movie.

Passed with 3 writers. Kudos.

$40 million dollar production budget. Really?

Hide and Seek, 2005: PASS

Commercial Success

Writer: Ari Schlossberg

Director: John Polson

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: A wife wants to commit suicide.

Story: Family

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by Dakota Fanning.

Excellent acting by Robert De Niro. One of his best roles.

Comments:

Good intro.

Excellent child scenes throughout.

Excellent home scenes throughout.

Excellent tone to movie.

Excellent writing and directing.

Excellent realization scene. Holy f*ck. I did not see that coming.

Excellent climax scene.

Good ending.

Excellent, writing, directing, music, acting, cinematography.

Solid movie.

Land of the Dead, 2005: FAIL

Potential Profit

Writer: George A. Romero

Director: George A. Romero

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: Zombies want to eat humans.

Story: Survival, Character

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by John Leguizamo as usual.

Comments:

Decent intro.

Fail of zombie scenes.

Fail of dystopia world. Too stupid.

Fail of most scenes.

Every year a new zombie movie. F*ck sakes.

Fail of underground fighting scene.

Fail of jail scene.

Fail of rebel zombie scenes throughout.

Fail of high class living.

Fail of almost all scenes. Complete fail of writing and directing.

Fail of tank scenes throughout.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

One of the worst movies of all time. This movie shouldn't have made $1.00. The fact that it made almost $50 million proves that God does NOT exist.

The Cave, 2005: FAIL

Commercial Failure

Writer: Michael Steinberg, Tegan West

Director: Bruce Hunt

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: Thieves want to rob a church.

Story: Ambition, Survival

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Good intro.

Decent cave/water scenes. But the aerial shots and music content are the real stars so far.

Hey, the girl from Coyote Ugly (Piper Perabo).

Hey, Cersei Lannister from Game of Thrones (Lena Headey). F*ck me.

The cinematography and music content is good, but can we get to the plot please.

45 minutes in, now it gets interesting.

Boring water scenes throughout.

Fail of climbing/creature scene.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

$30 million production budget. Really?

Cursed, 2005: PASS

Epic Commercial Failure

Writer: Kevin Williamson

Director: Wes Craven

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: A creature wants to curse people.

Story: Ambition, Relationships

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by Joshua Jackson.

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Good theatre scene.

Joshua Jackson from Dawson’s Creek. Wow. What a blast from the past.

Wow, a lot of big names in this movie.

Good set scenes throughout.

Good crash scene.

Split in half. Jokes, but still terrible.

Fail of boyfriend house scene.

Hey, the guy from Smallville (Michael Rosenbaum). Nice to see you again.

Good office scene.

Good school scenes throughout.

Good party scene.

Good underground parking lot scene.

Good home scenes throughout.

Psychically know when you're annoying someone. Jokes.

Decent gym scene.

Good bathroom scene.

Good parking lot scene.

Fail of girl fight scene.

Fail of werewolf scenes throughout, but still passable.

Good climax scene.

Good ending.

Cheesy but still entertaining.

A Sound of Thunder, 2005: FAIL

Epic Commercial Failure

Writer: Thomas Dean Donnelly, Joshua Oppenheimer, Gregory Poirier

Director: Peter Hyams

Dialogue: Fail

Terrible dialogue. Oh dear god.

Plot: A corporation wants to exploit time travel.

Story: Ambition, Survival

Characters: Fail

Acting: Fail

Comments:

Fail of intro. Powerfully stupid.

Fail of party scene.

They have no security. Really?

Terrible art work. Fail of Art director, which is a failure of directing.

No wild animals. I almost thought he was going to blame climate change.

Fail of lab scene.

Fail of apartment scene.

Was this movie really made in 2005? I have to recheck.

Fail of transport process scene.

Fail of all government regulator scenes throughout.

Fail of garden talk scene.

Fail of music content throughout.

Fail of writing, directing, acting, music, special effects.

Were the studio executives, producers and writer on crack cocaine when making this movie? Because it would explain a lot.

Fail of almost all scenes.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

***Do not watch this movie. Should only be watched as a reference in how NOT to make a movie.

One of the worst movies of all time. This movie shouldn't have made $1.00. The fact that it made less than $15 million proves that God DOES exist.

3 writers. Too many cooks in the kitchen.

$80 million production budget. Warner Bros. Pictures has money to burn.

Racing Stripes, 2005: PASS

Potential Profit

Writer: David Schmidt

Director: Frederik Du Chau

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: A teenager wants a better life.

Story: Ambition, Family, Relationships

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Good intro. A bit overdramatic but it's okay.

Good animal scenes throughout.

6 minutes in and I can guess the plot.

Good postal worker scene.

A lot of big name voice actors.

Joshua Jackson from Dawson's Creek. Wow.

Fail of night race horse scene.

Too much animal talking.

Good fly characters.

Good evening ride scene.

Good first race scene.

Good father/daughter scenes throughout.

Not the best family movie, but solid enough.

Good night barn scene.

Good training scenes throughout.

Interfering with my Mozart. Jokes.

Good barn escape scene.

Born too old for this. Jokes.

Good climax scene.

The postal worker. Jokes.

Good ending.

Supercross, 2005: PASS

Epic Commercial Failure

Writer: Ken Solarz, Bart Baker

Director: Steve Boyum

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: Guys want to be the best in motocross.

Story: Ambition, Relationships, Family

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Decent intro.

Good stadium scene.

Tens of thousands of people watching motocross. And people wonder why sexism, racism, inequality and greed exist. You can't solve it if you're being entertained for life by sports and Hollywood TV shows and movies.

Decent pool scene.

Decent garage scene.

Good truck talk scene.

Ah…the things we do for a woman. But only if she's the one.

Good race girl scene.

Good race scene.

Good corporate scene.

Good dirt race scene.

Decent bar scene.

Good street race scene.

Good home scenes throughout.

Good race scenes throughout.

Singing about womens’ breasts. I don’t think the MeToo movement would approve.

Good prep scenes throughout.

Good girl scene.

Good father talk scene.

Good hospital scene.

Good corporate talk scene.

Good shed scene.

Decent climax scene.

Decent ending.

The relationship stuff was a bit weak but passable. But I understand why it was an Epic Commercial Failure.

Underclassman, 2005: FAIL

Epic Commercial Failure

Writer: Brent Goldberg, David Wagner

Director: Marcos Siega

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: Thieves want to steal cars.

Story: Ambition, Character, Relationships

Characters: Fail

Acting: Fail

Fail of Nick Cannon’s acting. Not the right actor for the role.

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Police officers on bikes. Sigh.

Hey, the girl from Martial Law (Kelly Hu).

Fail of almost every scene because of Nick Cannon’s terrible acting.

Fail of night theft car scene.

Fail of basketball scene.

Fail of police precinct scenes throughout.

Fail of school scenes throughout.

Fail of music content throughout.

Fail of principal scene.

Fail of basketball scene.

Decent fight scene.

Fail of cafeteria scene.

Fail of boat scene.

Complete fail of writing, directing, acting.

At least all the movie extras got paid.

Decent rugby scene.

Good basketball scene.

Good alley scene.

Decent party scene.

Good second party scene.

Fail of chase scene.

Good warehouse scene.

Fail of next warehouse car scene.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

The Greatest Game Ever Played, 2005: FAIL

Epic Commercial Failure

Writer: Mark Frost

Director: Bill Paxton

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: A golf club doesn't want to admit a man into the club.

Story: Ambition

Characters: Fail

Acting: Fail

Fail of Shia LaBeouf’s acting. Not the right actor for the role.

Comments:

Fail of intro.

A game played by gentlemen. Oh dear.

Boring scenes throughout.

Slow motions of their swings with applause. Just die already.

Stephen Dillane from Game of Thrones. Nice to see you.

Fail of gentlemen meeting scene.

A caddy gets a shot. Really?

Fail of pace of movie. Slow and boring.

Fail of party scene.

Decent to good golf scenes throughout.

Fail of club talk scenes throughout.

Given vs. earned. Yah yah, affirmative action.

Fail of father-son scenes throughout.

Good chubby boy caddy character scenes throughout.

LaBeouf’s acting really killed the movie.

Fail of writing and acting.

Fail of climax scene.

Good ending.

Million Dollar Baby, 2005: FAIL

Commercial Success

Writer: Paul Haggis

Director: Clint Eastwood

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: A man doesn't want to train a female boxer.

Story: Ambition, Character

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Fail of Hilary Swank's acting. Not the right actress for the role.

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Fail of priest scene.

Too much narration throughout.

Fail of training gym scenes throughout.

Fail of firing scene.

Trains her by default. Lovely.

Boring dialogue throughout.

Fail of tone of movie. Fail of writing and directing.

Fail of female fight scenes throughout. Boring.

Good diner talk scene.

Fail of family house scene.

People who don't mind getting the sh*t beaten out of them. Lovely.

Fail of hospital scene.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

Doom, 2005: FAIL

Epic Commercial Failure

Writer: David Callaham, Wesley Strick

Director: Andrzej Bartkowiak

Dialogue: Fail

Terrible dialogue throughout.

Plot: An alien creature wants to kill people.

Story: Ambition

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Good acting by Rosamund Pike as usual.

Comments:

Fail of intro. A portal. Oh dear.

Fail of facility death scene.

Fail of chill scene.

Fail of music content throughout.

Fail of ship talk scene.

Fail of portal scene.

Fail of almost all scenes.

How did this movie get a wide release? Star power.

Bioengineered? Maybe scientists in the 21st century could take note.

Fail of writing.

Fail of medical scene.

Fail of flashback scene.

I never want to see Vin Diesel protest gun violence or support the war against masculinity.

Fail of realization scene.

Gotta love atheist scientists. They've already partially destroyed the world with pesticides and weapons. Genetic experimentation should be a given.

Genetic markers for psychotics. Sorry, but that’s junk science.

Fail of writing, directing, music.

Fail of video game style scenes.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

$60 million production budget. Universal Pictures has money to burn.

Wolf Creek, 2005: FAIL

Epic Commercial Success

Writer: Greg McLean

Director: Greg McLean

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: Young people want to explore the outback.

Story: Relationships, Survival

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Fail of party scene.

Ah…the young hippie life.

What did you expect in a hick diner?

Fail of most scenes.

Real plot almost an hour in. Really?

Fail of torture scene.

They don't know how to kill someone. Really?

Fail of writing.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

Kudos to the skinny production budget.

Two for the Money, 2005: FAIL

Epic Commercial Failure

Writer: Dan Gilroy

Director: Daniel John Caruso Jr.

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: A man wants a better life.

Story: Ambition, Relationships, Character

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Fail of Al Pacino's acting. Not the right actor for the role.

Comments:

Fail of intro.

All wrongs can be made right with sports. Of course.

Decent football scene.

Fail of narration throughout.

Interesting solution.

Ah…the opportunities given to beautiful White people. Lovely.

Fail of tone of movie.

Fail of office talk scene.

Rene Russo. Always a pleasure.

Fail of nails scene.

Fail of most scenes. Fail of writing.

Creating a persona to sell the image. Yup, sounds about right.

Fail of office scene.

Fail of gambling speech scene.

P*ssies who can't bet properly. Oh dear.

Fail of hooker wife talk scene.

Fail of health plot.

Fail of high roller scene.

Fail of blow up scene.

Fail of climax scene.

Good ending.

The Wedding Date, 2005: FAIL

Potential Profit

Writer: Dana Fox

Director: Clare Kilner

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: A woman wants a better life.

Story: Relationships

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Good acting by Debra Messing.

Excellent acting by Sarah Parish.

Fail of Dermot Mulroney's acting. Not the right actor for the role.

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Fail of apartment scene.

Women who feel whole only when they're with a man. I'm sure the feminist movement would be so proud.

Good airport scene.

Interesting solution. Desperate, but interesting.

Insecure women. And I thought feminism solved that. Guess not.

Decent dress scene.

Decent speech scene.

Good cousin scenes throughout.

Fail of bar scene.

Decent house scenes throughout.

Good bathroom scene.

Good park scene.

Good bridal party scene.

Good bachelor scene.

Decent street scene.

Decent sex scene.

Weak characters throughout.

I feel the music is an attempt to cover up for the weak characters.

Good outdoor scene.

Weak dialogue throughout.

Fail of wine cellar realization scene.

Weak room scene.

Good climax scene.

Fail of ending.

It had potential to pass with a better writer.

The Jacket, 2005: FAIL

Epic Commercial Failure

Writer: Massy Tadjedin

Director: John Maybury

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: US govt wants to convict a man for murder.

Story: Ethics

Characters: Fail

Fail of all characters.

Acting: Pass

Excellent acting by Adrien Brody.

Fail of Daniel Craig's acting.

Comments:

Decent intro.

Fail of time passage scene.

Good road truck scene.

Good car scene.

Fail of court scenes. Doesn't work.

Fail of psyc ward intro scenes.

That's just cruel. But people in psyc wards are just experiments for cruel atheist scientists.

Everything seems too unbelievable.

Daniel Craig. Wow, I almost didn't recognize you.

Fail of visualization scenes throughout.

Fail of house scene.

Complete fail of almost all scenes. Solution is beyond suspension of disbelief.

Fail of out of control room scene.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

Derailed, 2005: PASS

Potential Profit

Writer: Stuart Beattie

Director: Mikael Hafstrom

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: A company wants to take an employee off an account.

Story: Relationships, Family, Ambition

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Good intro.

Good house scenes throughout.

Good train scenes throughout.

Ethically impugned. Jokes.

Good office scenes throughout.

Good medical condition scene.

Good bar scene.

Fail of hotel scene. Doesn't make sense. But I think it will in the end.

And the plot thickens.

Good phone scenes throughout.

Excellent house with new guy scene.

Good detective scenes throughout.

Yah…I thought so.

Good climax scene.

Good ending.

Solid movie.

Because of Winn-Dixie, 2005: PASS

Commercial Failure

Writer: Joan Singleton

Director: Wayne Wang

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: Kids don't want to be friends with a girl.

Story: Ambition, Relationships

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Good child acting by AnnaSophia Robb.

Comments:

Decent intro.

Good church scenes throughout.

Good house scenes throughout.

Good grocery scene.

Good dog scenes throughout.

Slips on grass. Jokes.

Good pet store scenes throughout.

Bald headed babies. Jokes.

Fail of visualization scene.

Good tone to movie.

Good sheriff scene.

Good climax scene.

Good ending.

Not the best family comedy drama, but solid enough to pass.

Good writing and acting.

Cry Wolf, 2005: FAIL

Epic Commercial Success

Writer: Jeff Wadlow, Beau Bauman

Director: Jeff Wadlow

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: Someone wants to kill a woman.

Story: Ambition

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Good intro.

Decent school intro.

Fail of game scene. Too stupid.

Fail of class scene.

At least there’s good diversity. That's nice.

Fail of cafeteria scene.

Fail of solution scene. Too stupid.

Good visualization scenes throughout.

Easily anticipated what will happen.

Fail of pool scene.

Ah…the sad life of rich White people. Cry me a river.

Fail of most scenes.

Good acting but weak characters.

Fail of class scene.

Fail of party attack scene.

Fail of principal scene.

Fail of chapel talk scene.

Fail of kill scenes.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

Kudos for the $1 million production budget. Which means that the actors were getting paid next to nothing.

Dreamer, 2005: PASS

Commercial Failure

Writer: John Gatins

Director: John Gatins

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: An owner wants to race a horse.

Story: Family, Ambition

Characters: Pass

Acting: Pass

Good acting all around.

Comments:

Decent intro.

Good house scene.

Good horse stable scene.

Fail of race accident scene. A better director could have made it look better.

Good horse owner stable scene.

How many horse whisperer movies is Hollywood going to make? Christ.

Good child/horse scenes throughout.

Good father and grandfather scenes throughout.

Fail of horse run scene. Could have made it into a great moment.

Good father grandfather stable scene.

Good race horse sale scene.

Good classroom scene.

A child has no legal ownership power because they can't consent. But...I'll let it slide.

Good training scenes throughout.

Good board scene.

Good stable offer scene.

Fail of prince lunch scene.

Good car celebration scene.

Good climax scene.

Good ending.

Decent writing, but the acting helped pass the movie. A lot of scenes could have been better though.

Oliver Twist, 2005: FAIL

Epic Commercial Failure

Writer: Ronald Harwood

Director: Roman Polanski

Dialogue: Pass

Plot: A school wants to get rid of an orphan boy.

Story: Ambition

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Fail of intro.

Slave labor in the name of education. Oh dear.

Fail of night scene.

Fail of over-the-top reaction.

Fail of most scenes.

Brain fever. Oh dear.

Fail of writing.

Period pieces are always a tough sell.

The dog is ugly but still cute.

Fail of climax scene.

Good ending.

$60 million production budget. Sony Pictures Releasing has money to burn.

The Perfect Man, 2005: FAIL

Commercial Failure

Writer: Gina Wendkos

Director: Mark Rosman

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: A man wants to break up with a woman.

Story: Relationships, Family

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Good acting by Vanessa Lengies.

Comments:

Decent intro.

Heather Locklear. Wow. Nice to see you.

Decent drive scene.

White people blogging about their sh*tty life. Sigh.

Skin virginity. Jokes.

Decent intro school scene.

Decent store scene.

Decent parent meeting scene.

Hilary Duff's narration is starting to get annoying.

Can't afford to pee here. Jokes.

Fail of restaurant scene.

Interesting solution.

Fail of most school scenes throughout.

Fail of store scenes throughout.

Fail of concert scene.

Boring scenes.

Too much narration.

Fail of sprinkler scene.

Fail of climax scene.

Decent ending.

I wanted to pass this movie, but the terrible writing wouldn't let me.

King's Ransom, 2005: FAIL

Epic Commercial Failure

Writer: Wayne Conley

Director: Jeffrey W. Byrd

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: An ex-wife wants to take half of her husband's company.

Story: Relationships, Ambition

Characters: Fail

Fail of all characters, except Roger Cross' character.

Acting: Fail

Fail of acting all around.

Comments:

Fail of intro.

A super rich Black man. Too unbelievable. Beyond suspension of disbelief. Ha ha ha.

Fail of office scenes.

How many crappy plots. Christ.

Fail of all ex-wife lawyer scenes.

Donald Faison from Scrubs. Nice to see you.

Fail of parking scene.

Fail of board meeting scene.

Roger Cross from First Wave. Nice to see you. A stutterer. Jokes.

Fail of prison scene.

Fail of party scene.

Excellent limo holdup scene. Best scene in the movie. Holy f*ck, that was excellent.

Good van kidnap scene.

Fail of basement scene.

Fail of convict scenes throughout.

The solution works but the characters and acting fail completely.

Fail of most scenes.

Fail of realization scene.

Fail of imitator scenes throughout.

Fail of store scene.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.

Point of the movie: if you're rich, never marry a Black woman. Oh dear.

Cinderella Man, 2005: FAIL

Commercial Failure

Writer: Cliff Hollingsworth, Akiva Goldsman

Director: Ron Howard

Dialogue: Fail

Plot: A family wants to survive the Great Depression.

Story: Ambition, Family

Characters: Fail

Acting: Pass

Comments:

Good intro.

Fail of outdoor scene.

Good kitchen scene.

Fail of fight scene.

Decent work scene.

Decent struggling scene.

Ah…what desperation does to a man.

Fail of neighborhood scene.

Decent fight scenes throughout.

Fail of tone of movie.

Good home scene.

Fail of wife character. Doesn't make sense.

Beat him psychologically first and then you have him. Yah yah.

Decent film scene.

Fail of party scene.

The tone works for the kids, but not for the boxing fight.

Fail of climax scene.

Fail of ending.